Clara Loft shows up on screen and you instantly know the game is not pretending to be “serious archaeology”. She opens her mouth, that smug British accent hits you, and suddenly you’re way less interested in lost temples and way more curious about what’s under the shorts that are absolutely not work-appropriate. The whole thing feels like some horny fan project that escaped from a Discord server and grew just enough muscle to become a real game. In a good way. Mostly. You’re the new assistant, which sounds important, but quickly turns into “guy who carries the bags, gets insulted, and maybe, if he plays his cards right, ends up with his cock somewhere near those ridiculous tits.” The story acts like it’s about relics and curses and puzzles, but half the time it’s just an excuse to put Clara in one more situation where her ass is sticking out while she complains she “can’t quite reach”. Sure, professor. Of course you can’t.

The teasing is honestly the main event here. She talks a lot, and it’s actually voiced, not that weird text-to-speech flat stuff. She’ll roast you for staring, then lean forward anyway, then pretend she doesn’t notice your character literally masturbating in the tent while she’s humming on the other side of the canvas. There’s this one scene where you’re supposed to be guarding some artifact and instead end up watching her bathe through a hole in the wall. That moment is so stupidly predictable and still works. She keeps doing that “half annoyed, half amused” thing, like she knows exactly what you’re doing with your hand. And yeah, the game does not shy away from going all the way. Blowjobs, handjobs, riding you until her tits bounce way past realistic physics, sliding them around your cock like she’s trying to polish a trophy, and eventually some heavier stuff if you keep pushing her down the more corrupted path instead of playing the sweet gentleman. It leans into parody, so one second she’s moaning in your ear, next second she’s cracking some meta joke about “player choices” while you’re balls deep in her ass. Completely ruins the mood and somehow makes it hotter.

Mechanically, it’s like a horny choose-your-own-mistake adventure with some actual puzzles sprinkled in just to make sure you’re not clicking with one hand the whole time. A few of the “combat” bits feel like they exist only so the dev can say, see, this is a real game, not just porn, look, there’s a health bar. Nobody is fooled. The AI art gives everything this slightly off, dreamlike vibe where Clara’s boobs seem to grow a bit from one scene to the next and you’re not sure if it’s the supposed “breast expansion” angle or just the model losing its mind. Sometimes her face shifts a little weird mid animation and it’s like she’s turning into a different hot cousin for half a second. I kind of liked it, even while my brain was going, what the hell, pick a version and stick with it. Also, small complaint: there is one button in the UI that looks like it should open a proper settings menu but only gives you like three options and none of them are the one you want and it irritated me way more than it should. Anyway, if the idea of a smug, big-titted archaeologist slowly turning into your personal plaything while she pretends to still be in charge sounds fun, this thing absolutely leans into that fantasy and then trips over its own jokes, stands up, and shoves your dick between her boobs again.

It starts messy, in the best possible way. You’re tossed into this warped version of the galaxy far, far away - not the kind that smells like burnt metal and destiny, but one thick with sweat and bad decisions. The whole thing feels like a fever dream that someone spun out after one too many Holonet smut threads. You’re the guy who somehow made it to Jedi Knight while everyone else got distracted by the war or by each other’s asses (and they’re massive here, holy hell). Half the time you forget why you’re supposed to be saving anything because Barriss bends forward mid-dialogue and the robe just... doesn’t hold. Then there’s Aayla, all cool confidence until her mouth opens, breathing hard like she’s half-daring you to break the code. They all do that. Even Padme - who says words about diplomacy but arches her back every time your name drops. It’s ridiculous and hot at once, like watching porn on mute during a political debate.

The turn-based fights almost feel like foreplay. Every encounter teases longer than necessary, camera angles doing that thing where you can’t tell if you’re fighting monsters or auditioning them for something darker. When Bo-Katan shows up, the whole tempo changes - less talk, more bite - and suddenly the lightsaber doesn’t look like a weapon anymore. My favorite stupid detail: in the menu, somebody coded a “meditation” button that just leads to sex scenes. Lazy? Sure. But it fits. Nothing here pretends to be noble; it’s all dirty Jedi business in slow motion. And when the game finally pops one of those creampie endings, you don’t even blink. You just chuckle, fix the screen ratio on your phone, and keep pressing through because apparently defeat can look like victory if the moaning syncs just right.

Weird thing is - somewhere between the teasing and the parody nonsense - it stops feeling like a joke. You catch yourself liking these twisted versions more than the real ones. Maybe that’s the Force talking. Or just the fact that the writing knows exactly how low you’ll sink for another glimpse under a Jedi robe.

This RWBY parody throws you into Beacon Academy as some kind of therapist or counselor, which honestly sounds like the worst job ever until you realize what kind of "therapy" you'll be providing. The whole premise is basically "what if you had authority over all these anime girls and decided to be a complete creep about it?" - and yeah, that's exactly what happens.

The point-and-click mechanics work fine I guess, though sometimes clicking on things feels weird and unresponsive. You're basically going around corrupting everyone from Ruby to Yang to that ice queen Weiss, plus a bunch of other characters I can't even remember the names of. The corruption progression is pretty standard trainer game stuff - start innocent, gradually push boundaries, eventually everyone's throwing themselves at you because... reasons? The dialogue tries to be funny but it's hit or miss, mostly miss if I'm being honest. Some of the sexual harassment scenarios are so over-the-top they loop back to being amusing, like when you're supposed to be helping with "emotional support" but you're just groping people. The handjob scenes are decent enough, and there's plenty of big tits bouncing around if that's your thing. Blake's corruption arc was actually kind of hot, but then again I might just have a thing for cat girls. Wait, was I talking about the gameplay? The harem aspect builds up slowly which is good because rushing into it would've been even more ridiculous than it already is. Some of the 3D models look janky as hell though - Yang's hair clips through her body half the time and it's distracting during the good parts. The male domination stuff gets pretty intense later on, way more than I expected from something that started so tame. Honestly the whole thing feels like someone's power fantasy about being a shitty guidance counselor, but somehow it works better than it should.

Idle Waifu feels like one of those games you open in another tab “just to check something” and then suddenly your tea is cold and your dick is tired. It’s super simple on the surface, like those cheap idle clickers you play on your phone when pretending to answer Slack messages, but here the whole point is staring at horny anime girls auto-grinding their levels while you plan which outfit you wanna tear off next. The loop is dumb in a good way: numbers go up, affection goes up, clothes get shorter, animations get nastier. You don’t need a guide, you just poke around, click stuff, watch bars fill and asses jiggle. Feels almost like cheating, like the game is doing all the work and you’re just the pervert supervisor.

The real hook is how every outfit basically feels like you bought a new porn loop for that girl. One moment she’s in some half-assed “casual” clothes that already look too slutty for outside, next she’s in a micro bikini, then some cosplay that looks like they asked ChatGPT “make me a priest outfit but filthy” and just accepted the first answer. A lot of it clearly AI cooked, faces a bit too perfect, hair not completely matching, sometimes the boobs look like they could break physics, but it kinda fits the lazy horny vibe. You grind for gold, buy that new outfit, hit the scene, and suddenly she’s riding cock with 3 speeds like you’re scrolling through TikTok, except every swipe is just “faster, faster, ok now I’m actually clenching”. The speed control is funny, like watching a porn gif in VLC and mashing plus key. Slow for edging, medium for “yeah this looks like sex”, max speed for “this is a jackhammer from hell and I respect it”.

What I liked most is this trashy mix of chill and depraved. You can literally leave it on, go answer messages on WhatsApp or doomscroll Twitter, then come back and boom, enough points to unlock another outfit where she’s dripping wet and bouncing on dick like it’s a pogo stick. Sometimes the loops are a bit too short, like you’re about to cum and the animation resets, and your brain goes “bro, just five more frames please”. Some of the body types feel copy pasted too, like the AI only learned “titty big = good” and never took a day of anatomy class. But then you unlock one scene where she’s pinned, thighs shaking, tits slapping against her chest while she’s getting pounded from below, and any complaint just melts out of your head. I wish there was more “cruel” stuff, more bad endings where she clearly had enough and you still don’t stop, but that’s my broken taste speaking. Here it’s softer, more “endless horny loop” than tragic fall, yet there is still this tiny sadness when you realize you’re grinding affection with a virtual doll made by another virtual brain. Anyway. Dare to play it alone, or keep it running in a hidden tab while pretending to check your email, I’m not your dad.

You start as this kinda clueless guy dumped into a “totally not official” region, phone in one hand, half a chub in the other, and suddenly you’re supposed to be both monster trainer and professional horndog. The game plays it like a classic monster RPG, turn based fights and all, but every win feels more like you’re grinding Tinder than grinding levels. You throw balls at monsters, then five minutes later you’re throwing something else at Misty in a changing room. I was half expecting it to be all tease, but nope, it goes hard on the porn side. Big asses, big tits, tiny shorts, way too much bending over. Cynthia shows up with that smug “I know you’re staring at my boobs” energy, and the game absolutely rewards you for being a thirsty idiot. You can wander around like a sandbox, poke into houses you clearly shouldn’t, get sidetracked by some milf asking for “help with her Pokémon” who definitely does not mean her Pokémon. At one point I was supposed to go beat a gym and instead spent 30 minutes trying to trigger a specific sex scene with Nessa because someone on a Reddit thread said it was animated differently on the second try. They were right, by the way. Worth it.

The pickup line stuff hit me harder than I expected. You actually choose dialogue in some scenes, and it feels like speed dating with cheat codes turned off. One option is polite, one is horny, one is just straight up degenerate. I tested them like a weirdo doing field research. On Telegram I even sent screenshots to a language exchange buddy asking “does this line sound like a real fuckboy?” He said yes and I felt strangely proud. Sometimes being bold pays off and Misty basically jumps your dick in the locker after a battle. Other times you try something dirty on Dawn, and she goes “wow, creepy” and the scene turns colder, you still get sex later, but the vibe is different, more rough, less cuddly. It actually teaches you something weird about tone, even if the game itself is mostly about shoving your cock into every trainer with a pulse. The monsters are just there like foreplay excuses, beat one, unlock a new way to rail someone. I wish there was an option to mute the moaning without muting sound effects, but the game doesn’t care what I want and honestly that fits. At one point I forgot the main quest completely and just walked in circles trying new lines on Cynthia to see which one made her blush the most. Felt like using OkCupid in a fantasy world where every match wants to fuck you five minutes after small talk. Dare to play it alone, or invite company?

Pokestars is basically what happens when someone looks at the old anime and goes, “yeah but what if they all wanted to fuck the trainer instead of chase badges,” and then actually commits to the bit. You’re this dude who somehow lands in this luxury pokemon training resort that’s less about ranked battles and more about which girl you’re making moan behind the stadium later. It’s played like one of those point and click dating sims where you bounce between locations on a map, poke on stuff, poke on girls, poke on buttons, in that order. May, Misty and Dawn are the main stars here, and they’re not subtle. First time you meet Misty she already has that “I’m gonna test you” energy, except it’s not a gym test, it’s whether you can keep up with her mouth while the battle scoreboard is still flickering in the background. It’s funny because the game pretends to care about rankings and resort rules, but after like ten minutes you’re mostly just planning who you’ll fuck in which corner of the map and if you can trigger another animated scene before clicking through the dialog you half read.

What I liked a lot is that it doesn’t waste too much time teasing without payoff. You win a fight? You’re not getting a high five; you’re getting on your knees or putting her on hers. There are full-on oral scenes where you literally watch her head move, with voice lines that are not studio-perfect, but that kinda makes it better, feels more like a weird fan project that got horny and never stopped. Vaginal scenes too, with those 3dcg bodies pressed together and enough motion to not feel static. Sometimes the moans don’t sync perfectly with the thrusts and it made me laugh, but I still didn’t skip it, so whatever. The resort itself works like a hub: pool, rooms, arenas, those spots you click just to see if someone’s there to jump your dick. You get some dating sim flavor on top of it all, little choices in dialog, giving attention to one girl over another, pretending you care about who has the strongest team when you’re actually just angling for a threesome later. There’s even this moment where Dawn corners you in a hallway after a match, her voice goes low and you can hear the slight echo like they actually thought about the room, and suddenly she’s on her back on a bench, panties around one ankle, you pushing in while she still has her gloves on. That kind of detail is the thing that keeps you clicking “next” even when a line of text is kinda cheesy.

The voiced parts are the big hook and also the thing that sometimes makes it feel janky in a good way. May has this cute, eager tone when she goes down on you, wet sounds and breath mixing, but then every once in a while a line sounds like it was recorded in another room or on a different mic. It pulled me out for half a second and then there’s a close-up of her lips sliding down your shaft and suddenly I don’t care anymore. Harem angle is strong too, not just one-on-one stuff. You get those scenes where two of them tag-team you, one sucking while the other rides, like a porn parody that forgot to blur anything. And the point and click side makes it feel a bit like a scavenger hunt for sex; “if I go to the resort hot springs at this time, will Misty be there? Will she be naked already? Can I trigger that one scene where she sits on my face first and then demands I pound her right after?” Sometimes the pacing drags and you’re just clicking through resort menus looking for the next bit of action instead of actually doing trainer things, but then the game throws another animated fuck sequence at you and your brain forgives it instantly. It’s not classy, it’s not subtle, it’s literally fan fantasy turned into a horny resort simulator, and yeah, it works.

The whole thing feels like somebody mashed together a horny Final Fantasy fanfic, a cheap mobile survival clone and a beach episode that never ends, then said “yeah, good enough” and shipped it. Which, weirdly, kind of works. You wake up on this tropical island, sand in your shoes, dick in your hand metaphorically, literal later, and the first cutscene just slaps you with that “you’re a loser, now enjoy paradise” tone. The animation in those early scenes is rough in a way I actually like. Faces hold just a little too long, camera lingers on thighs like the animator forgot to hit stop, some lip sync looks like it was done in a hurry during a Discord call. But when Hana leans in close the first time, hair moving in the breeze, you can feel someone really tried. It is not clean. It feels like watching a lewd indie short posted on Twitter that somehow grew into a full game. And then you blink and suddenly there is Tifa in a bikini that never existed in any official artwork, and the game just shrugs, like “yeah, she washed up here, whatever, go talk to her.”

Cutscenes are the best and worst part. One moment you get this slow, almost romantic shot of the island at sunset, the ocean reflecting orange, Hana’s silhouette, and you think “oh, nice mood.” Next moment, hard cut to the male protagonist getting jerked off against a palm tree like a teenager who just learned the word “frottage” yesterday. The camera really loves asses. It crawls over Tifa’s bikini line while she pretends she does not know what masturbation is, then five clicks later she is riding your face in a little looping animation where her hair clips through her shoulders in exactly the same place every cycle. Marie Rose shows up in her swimsuit and that whole “mystery of the island” thing just walks out of the room. The plot starts hinting that the island is wrong, that girls are not just lost tourists, but the next scene is you spanking Marie on the beach while a crab walks through the background like an unpaid extra. The point and click bits are fine, you tap on a coconut, you tap on a girl, you tap on yourself under the water in a badly hidden masturbation loop. Sex toys appear later and the game treats them like legendary weapons, full camera pan, shiny highlight, then you just shove a vibrator between Tifa’s legs in a short looping shot that probably took the animator all night and two energy drinks. There is a mystery somewhere under all the crossover fanservice, but every time you start to care the game distracts you with another animated bikini grinding on the protagonist’s cock and, honestly, that is exactly the kind of trashy commitment I did not know I wanted.

Ark is basically the kind of idiot king that every hentai forum thread secretly wants to be. He’s supposed to be building a “serious” power base and challenging this smug, horny demon queen called Lady Erostegia for the throne, but half the time it feels like he’s just stumbling from one set of tits to the next and somehow that counts as politics. The story pretends it’s high fantasy, with courts and schemes and all that, but then you're blackmailing a holy knight because you caught her fingering herself in a shrine, or getting a footjob in a council chamber while two nobles argue about taxes in the background. It sounds messy? It is messy. That’s the charm. Characters don’t just pop in to suck your dick and vanish, they kind of stick around, open their own side dramas, get jealous, make stupid decisions, and you realize you’re suddenly tracking who already took your virginity in which timeline like you’re doing homework on Pornhub notes. I liked that the game pretends you have moral choices while also shoving your cock into almost every scene. You can “corrupt” the sweet girls slowly, or be that bastard who uses them like tools, but honestly, even when you go for wholesome romance, you’re still probably going to end up creampie stuffing someone on a throne or sneaking into their bed for sleep sex while they mumble your name in their dreams. Totally immoral. Very nice.

What really sells it is how shameless it is about mixing goofy humor with real filth. One moment there's a milf sorceress scolding you like a teacher, next moment you have her drooling on your shaft, voice shaking as she tries to keep her “royal advisor” act together while you make her gag. The game likes to tease you a lot too. There are scenes where girls cosplay as “innocent” maidens or parody characters from other series, and if you’re a degenerate who spends too much time on certain subreddits, you’ll spot what they’re referencing and probably feel weirdly called out. Animations are not some crazy high-budget masterpiece, but they do the job really well: hips grind, toes curl around your dick in those footjob scenes, cum actually lands where it’s supposed to instead of doing that weird floaty manga thing. The voice work helps a lot. Some moans are soft and embarrassed, others are like “fuck me more, king” with that dominant tone that makes you feel like you’re the one getting conquered. There’s female domination stuff that can hit hard if you let Erostegia or one of the more twisted girls take the lead, pushing you to the bed, making you beg, riding you until you’re actually a little scared of how much they enjoy milking you dry. Or you can play it like a pure power trip and turn them into your drooling toys instead. NTR and swinging paths are there in the background like a loaded gun in the drawer: you can avoid them, but just knowing they exist gives the whole sandbox more tension. You’re fucking them, but are you sure they’re not fucking someone else behind the curtains? The game never stops reminding you that being king in a sex-obsessed court means everyone is watching, everyone is scheming, and half the time you’re too busy buried in some girl’s pussy to notice who’s spying on you from the shadows.

Your little scrap of a raft dies on the shore of a hot, sticky island, and somehow you’re still thinking about pussy and power. Priorities, right? Then you realize where you are. This isn’t just some random tropical rock with coconuts and crabs. This is *that* island. The one every pervert on certain Discord servers screams about. Maiden Island. All those rumors about the empress, Boa Hancock, parading around with that impossible ass and attitude? Yeah, she actually exists here, walking around like she owns the entire ocean, and honestly, she kind of does. You’re the unlucky idiot who washed up here with a Devil Fruit that doesn’t promise fire or lightning or some cool logia stuff. No, yours twists bodies. Makes muscle bloom where soft curves used to be. Not just “a bit toned” either. We’re talking from thick to gym freak to full-on amazon that looks like she could bench press the Thousand Sunny and then use you as a tiny cock toy after.

The game basically throws you into this sandbox and tells you: “Alright, perv, go ruin these women in the best way.” Nami’s here too, wandering around like she’s on a tropical side quest, tits bouncing like she never heard of proper support, already stacked but still so small compared to what you can turn her into. At first she’s all wary, wants berries and maps and safety, then a few events later she’s flexing for fun, checking her new biceps with this mix of fear and secret horniness. That scene where she catches herself in the water reflection, bigger than she was that morning, gripping her own thigh because it looks too strong to be real, then asking you in this half embarrassed way, “You did this, right?” That one stuck with me. Not even the sex, just that weird little “oh shit I like this” moment. Boa is different. She starts at “you’re trash” and somehow gets even worse when her back gets covered in thick muscle and her thighs turn into soul crushing traps. There’s this one night scene where her silhouette blocks the moon and she makes you kneel, and you realize your transformation fetish and your humiliation kink are shaking hands and laughing at you. The game lets you push them through four muscle stages, and each jump feels like a new kink unlocking, with clothes fighting to hold on, boobs still huge but now packed on top of hard, veiny slabs. Sometimes it looks a bit crazy in the CG, like her arm should be illegal in half the world, but then she grabs you by the neck and it stops mattering.

What surprised me is how much time you actually spend worrying about food. These aren’t dainty anime waifus who nibble on one rice ball and giggle. You turn them big, they eat like gods, and if you don’t manage your storage right they get pissy and unstable. I liked that stress. I hated it too, but in a good “what the fuck am I doing with my life” way. You’re running around this sunny island, trying to juggle hunger meters, trigger scenes, and still find time to drool over Nami’s shorts getting tighter and Boa’s ass growing into some supernatural monument. It’s kind of funny how the game treats all of this as normal. “Oh, of course you want to turn every woman into a towering amazon with giant tits and tree-trunk legs, what else would you do with god-fruit?” There’s humor everywhere, stupid little gags, side comments that feel like the dev also scrolled too much Rule 34 and just decided to stop pretending. Sometimes the pacing is weird, like you grind for food for a while, then suddenly you’re in a serious story scene about loyalty and power and all you can think about is how her lats are wider than the door she just walked through. I wish there was an option to tone the boobs down for one run, just to see pure muscle focus, but it’s never going to happen, the game is fully married to big tits and big everything. It’s messy, horny, oddly cozy, and completely obsessed with watching these famous girls slowly outgrow their own bodies until you’re not sure if you want to worship them, fear them, or just get crushed under a single lazy thigh squeeze.

Imagine if somebody smashed together Witcher fanfic from some horny reddit thread, a corruption sim, and those old Flash-era slider puzzles, then wrapped it in 3dcg versions of Ciri, Triss and Yen that look just different enough to not get CDPR lawyers knocking. That’s basically the vibe here. You’re this random guy in a twisted “what if” version of the Continent where monsters are less scary than pregnancy and everyone’s moral compass is already hanging by a thread. The whole point is simple: talk your way into their heads, fuck up their ideals, and turn the iconic sorceresses and one slightly traumatized white-haired princess into a personal breeding cult that lives and breathes for your cock. It sounds edgy as hell written out, but in the game it feels more like a slow and messy slide into “okay I guess we’re doing creampies in Kaer Morhen now.”

The fun part is how each girl bends differently. Ciri starts all stubborn and righteous, the usual “I’ve seen worlds and you’re nothing to me” attitude, then a couple of sharp choices later she’s grinding on your lap in some ruined tower, talking shit but not actually moving away while you keep pushing her panties aside. The moment when you first decide if you’ll go for bareback with her, knowing the whole breeding angle is a big deal in this world, hits harder than it should in a porn game. Triss is the classic big-tits redhead temptation package, already halfway corrupt before you even touch her. One branch turns her into this needy thing who keeps insisting it’s “just magic experimentation” while you pump another load into her and watch that spell circle on the floor pulse brighter. Another path has her still pretending she’s doing it all for “the greater good,” which is hilarious when she’s moaning loud enough that even a deaf drowner would look over. And then there’s Yennefer: the smug brunette who treats you like an insect until you finally catch her on one weak moment, hand between her thighs under a desk, asking very calm questions while your fingers keep sliding deeper. The first time you drag her from “you’re beneath me” to “don’t pull out” in one scene is actually kind of satisfying in a shitty power fantasy way, although the writing stumbles sometimes, like it can’t decide if she’s broken, in love, or just horny on potions.

What threw me a bit is how one wrong dialogue choice quietly kills a whole route without telling you. You think you’re being clever or “in character” for a Witcher-style world, then suddenly Triss stops visiting your room and Ciri just talks about training again and your cock-worship harem dream is hanging by a thread. There is a corruption meter hiding behind the scenes, you can feel it when a scene suddenly flips from vanilla riding to “press her down and finish inside,” but the game never really bothers to explain it. Sometimes that’s hot, sometimes it’s just annoying, like when I spent three runs trying to get a specific interracial scene with Ciri and a dark-skinned merc guy joining in, only to realize one early “mercenaries are scum” line basically locked the dude out forever. Also, the faces look great most of the time, but Ciri’s white hair clips into her shoulder in one blowjob loop and it drove me crazy, because everything else in that animation is perfect, the way her eyes look up, spit shining your shaft, and then this stupid hair strand just phases through her armor like it’s made of smoke. Still clicked replay on it like five times though. And the creampie shots are surprisingly good for a parody thing: you feel the choice, like, do you risk knocking up a legendary sorceress just to watch her pussy leak onto the sheets, or do you pull out and disappoint her while she pretends not to care? I kept telling myself I’d play “smart” next run, avoid the hardcore corruption, try a more moral path, but I always end up back in that same castle room, hand hovering over the option that says “stay inside her” and thinking yeah, alright, one more time.