Everything about this game feels like some horny fever dream of a lazy knight who just wanted gold, boobs and trouble in the woods. You play this very average dude, not some shining hero, who gets shoved into this “kill the monster, get the treasure, impress the Hooters girls” kind of quest, and the whole thing leans hard into parody. It knows it’s ridiculous. The fantasy world feels like one of those cheap tavern wallpapers on Steam, but then the milfs show up with these insane curves, perfect for those big soft-tit moments, and suddenly you forget you were supposed to be a brave adventurer and not just a walking erection. The game lets you wander around like a sandbox, poking at places you shouldn’t, teasing big-ass monster girls, getting sucked off by women who absolutely know better, and everything has this messy, horny energy that feels more like a dirty joke that went too far than a “serious” adult story.

Combat is this simple turn-based thing, but it’s used more like foreplay than real challenge. You’re in a fight, you’re trading hits, then the scene slows down and the monster isn’t just a monster. She’s got thick thighs, obscene cleavage, and she leans in close, her tits almost spilling over your screen, and suddenly the “attack / defend / skill” thing gets weirdly erotic. Sometimes when you win, the reward isn’t just gold, it’s a full-on lewd scene: sloppy handjob with her drooling over your cock, tits pressed together and she’s milking you while making fun of how fast you cum, or you get pinned down by some big-titted fantasy milf who rides you like you’re just another loot chest. The AI CG is surprisingly expressive too, not perfect, it has that slightly off vibe here and there, but the faces when they tease you, the way lips wrap around nipples during boob-sucking scenes, the way their asses look in motion during the animated bits, it all creates this low-key hypnotic rhythm. I caught myself just staring at a jiggle loop longer than I want to admit, like some brain-dead caveman.

The pacing is weird in a good way. Sometimes things are slow, lots of teasing, a milf leaning over you, her top barely holding those giant tits, she makes you wait, strokes you lazily with her hand, spits on it a little, whispers stupid fantasy lines that still hit, then suddenly the game jumps into another silly quest or random joke and you’re like, “wait, I was about to cum, wtf.” It’s horny, then silly, then horny again, like switching tabs between Pornhub and YouTube memes. And yeah, the UI is a little clunky, some buttons feel like they got placed by a drunk goblin, one sound loop in the forest kept repeating and I wanted to smack my speakers, but then there’s this one scene where a thick milf pushes your head into her chest, you hear wet sucking, her moans get louder, her hips grind on your leg, and the sound mix suddenly just clicks. That heavy breathing, the sloppy mouth sounds when she licks your nipples, the wet strokes when she jerks you while staring into your eyes, it pulled me right back. The whole game is like that: a horny little adventure that pretends to be about slaying some beast, but really it’s about being used, teased and drained by big-tit fantasy women who know exactly what they’re doing and are having way too much fun with your poor hero.

Naruto: Trials of Menma throws you into this weird, horny side corner of Konoha where everything feels familiar and wrong at the same time. You’re Menma, like Naruto’s shadow version, not just a reskin, more like the dev’s excuse to mess with the cast without ruining canon too hard. It’s a visual novel with 3dcg scenes that look way better than I expected from a browser game, especially when the camera gets too close to Sakura’s chest or Hinata’s shy face turning bright red. The story pretends to care about shinobi politics and secrets in the Leaf, but honestly the real “hidden truths” are like: who’s secretly dripping for Menma, and how far can you push them with a mix of teasing, groping, and that slow corrupting vibe. One moment you’re in a semi-serious talk about missions with Naruto Uzumaki, next moment you’re alone with Sakura in some hallway, pressing her up against the wall, her pretending she hates it while her thighs twitch. The game loves that line where the girls act offended and still don’t pull away.

The way each girl is handled feels different. Sakura Haruno is all attitude and fake resistance, snapping at you, calling you an idiot, then freezing up when your hand stays on her ass one second too long. I had one scene with her in the hospital where she’s “checking your injuries” and the camera is definitely not focused on the bandages. You can push, grope her a little too obviously, and the animation sells it when her body leans into your touch for just half a breath. Hinata Hyuga is like soft porn weaponized. She can’t make eye contact, fidgets with her fingers, the classic shy girl thing, but the game lets you be cruelly patient with her. There’s a training ground scene where she trips, lands basically in your lap, and instead of jumping away she just sort of trembles while you slide your hand up her thigh. The teasing there is slow, almost painful, like you’re drawing circles on her skin and she’s waiting for you to go higher, but she can’t ask. In contrast, Ino is more predatory and it’s hot as hell even when it makes no sense. She leans on you, smirks, calls you “Menma-kun” like she already decided you’re her toy, then somehow she’s the one getting pinned and groped, pretending she let you win. That flip happens too fast, but her smug face melting into something needy hits just right.

What surprised me is how being a male protagonist that isn’t Naruto changes the whole mood. You’re not the goofy hero, more like this darker mirror walking through Naruto Shippuden vibes but twisted. Talk to Naruto himself and you almost forget it’s an adult game, then ten minutes later you’re sneaking around Konoha, hunting for a moment alone with Hinata while she’s technically still “his” crush. It feels deliciously wrong, like cheating in a story that never belonged to you. The animated bits are short but they focus on exactly what you want: a hand sliding under Sakura’s skirt, Hinata flinching as fingers graze her panties, Ino pressing your hand tighter on her own chest instead of pushing it away. Sometimes the pacing is a bit off, like you jump from mild flirting to full-on groping in the same dialogue chain, and I honestly got annoyed by one line that kept repeating in different scenes, like the writer forgot they used it already, but then Hinata’s tits bounce in that shy breathing animation and my brain just forgives it. It’s not subtle, not perfect, and the tone jumps from dark, almost villain-like stuff to goofy parody, then straight into horny grinding in a blink. Somehow that messy energy fits Menma’s whole thing. You’re walking around in Naruto’s world, but all your choices smell like lust and bad intentions, and every girl you meet ends up as another canvas for your hands and your dick, whether it takes gentle teasing or rough groping to get there.

Rei’s the kind of guy you swipe past in real life. Dead eyes, tired voice, running a shitty pawnshop in a part of town that smells like stale cigarettes and cheap cologne. The game throws you straight into his head, and it’s not heroic at all, which I kinda loved. He’s not a “nice guy secretly,” he’s just worn down, a little selfish, a little pervy, but still not trash enough to leave a pretty rich girl on the street to get grabbed again. Akari shows up in his life like a lost luxury item someone forgot to pick up. She’s all soft curves, expensive taste still leaking through her body language, tits that obviously don’t belong in a cramped pawnshop backroom. The first time you see her trying to sit prim and proper on this busted old sofa while her button-up shirt strains over her chest, it feels wrong in a fun way. She’s supposed to be untouchable, and the whole game is about how fast that “proper heiress” vibe rots once money and safety disappear.

The dirty part is not only the sex scenes, it’s how the game makes you slowly cross the line with her. You’re choosing how much you lean into being a creep. There’s this early moment when she’s exhausted, half-asleep after a bath, sitting in a towel. You can just let her rest or you can “adjust” the towel and your hand lingers way too long on her thigh. The camera angle makes you stare at the gap between her legs, the soft inner skin, the way she tenses but doesn’t pull away. She just looks at you with this mix of shame and need because she literally has nowhere else to go. That’s the vibe. You’re not forcing her screaming and scratching, but you’re 100% using her situation, testing how much harassment she’ll swallow to keep her new “home.” And what fucked me up a bit is how sometimes she starts to respond. You grope her “by accident” in the cramped kitchen, and by the third time, she doesn’t flinch, she just bites her lip. The voice acting sells it hard, those shaky breaths when you squeeze her tits from behind and she tries to scold you while her moan cracks in the middle. It feels like she’s slowly learning that her body is the only real currency left, and you’re the first investor.

Then there’s Ryuichi, the rich shark who decides he wants her like a status symbol and a toy at the same time. The netorare angle hits when you start getting scenes that feel like parallel worlds. In one path, you keep Akari close, corrupt her at your pace, those quiet scenes of her riding you in the dark, whispering that she doesn’t care about her old life anymore. In another, your choices fuck up and suddenly you’re standing in front of your phone screen in-game, looking at a video he sent you, where Akari is in some luxury suite, her perfect tits spilling out of a tight dress, his hand sliding up her thigh while she forces this polite smile. Later it gets worse. There’s a scene where she’s on his lap, legs spread, panties pushed aside, her voice shaking as she begs him to stop, but her hips keep grinding down on him anyway. The audio is brutal there, that mix of disgust and helpless arousal. She calls out your name once while he’s finger fucking her, and he laughs and pushes deeper, telling her nobody will believe she “didn’t want it” when she’s dripping all over his hand. You don’t even see Rei in that scene, just his mental absence, which somehow made it hotter and more wrong for me. You feel like a ghost watching your “girl” become his favorite toy, and it scratches that twisted itch of losing something you never truly owned. The multiple endings twist all that into different flavors of fucked up, some where you break her first, some where he does, some where she learns to enjoy being passed around like collateral. It’s messy, ugly, erotic as hell, and weirdly honest about how power, money and a pair of big tits can rewrite a person’s whole personality.

Harth starts as that clueless village boy type, but not the usual whiny one. More like the guy who thinks “yeah, my life is fine, I’ll just jerk off behind the barn and maybe marry some local virgin with fat tits one day” and then the world basically bends him over instead. The jump from quiet frontier mud to the capital is where the fun actually kicks in. At first it feels almost too slow, like a Sunday where nothing happens and you just scroll Pornhub categories out of boredom. Then suddenly he’s neck deep in church drama, magic crap, and way too many people who want to get into his pants or control what’s in them. The religious stuff is sneaky. You think it’s just background lore, then one moment you’re listening to some righteous sermon, next moment there’s a priestess with her robe “accidentally” sliding open, tits hanging, grinding on him in a shadowed alcove while a crowd passes by outside. Good old exhibitionist risk, and the sound when her ass slaps against the stone wall is disgusting and hot at the same time. As a sound freak, I kept replaying that bit just to hear the breathy whimper when he pushes in raw for the creampie. Could be just me, but that sticky noise when he pulls out later? That’s art. Ugly, wet art.

Sex variety is all over the place, in a nice “who wrote this and why are they in my brain” way. One scene has this prim religious girl who talks about purity every second line, then drops to her knees and gives him a slow, nervous blowjob that turns into total slut mode halfway in. The gagging and little choked moans are actually mixed well, not that copy paste stock stuff you sometimes hear in lower effort games. Then you go from that to a teasing footjob on a balcony with some rich city brat. The camera goes tight on her soles rubbing his shaft, toes squeezing, and when he finally shoots up her leg and onto those soft, pale arches, the squelchy drip sound is stupidly satisfying. I actually muted the music for that, because I’m picky like that and the BGM sometimes feels like cheap fantasy JRPG loop from a mobile app nobody plays anymore. Funny thing, the anal scenes hit harder than the expected standard vaginal ones. There is this one anal creampie with internal view that zooms right in on the ring stretching and relaxing around him, while you hear that low wet push noise when he bottoms out. It feels wrong in the best way. Although, some of the moans in that one don’t quite sync to the thrusts and it annoys me way more than it should. I kept waiting for them to fix it, like some patch coming, then remembered that I’m just yelling at my screen.

Romance is there, but it isn’t soft and fluffy. It’s more like people stumbling through desire and power games. One girl starts all sweet and shy, then ends up riding Harth’s face while fingering herself, basically using him, and I kinda love that she’s the one in charge. Femdom is not hardcore hardcore here, more casual humiliations, like making him jerk himself while she just watches and comments on his technique, then lazily finishes him with a bored handjob because “you’re too slow.” On the other side, there are dudes. The gay content is not treated like some joke or add-on. There’s a quiet moment with a city guard where they end up half drunk, talking about duty, then kissing, then the guard awkwardly working Harth’s cock with his hand, sweaty and unsure. Later you get full-on anal with him, and the grunting, low male moans are actually different from the female ones, which I appreciate way more than I should. Plus, seeing Harth pump a load deep into another guy while we get that same sticky internal shot you usually only see in straight scenes? Yeah. That hit. The game kinda drifts between innocent romance, messy religion, shameless public teasing, big ass bouncing in your face, tits pressed against windows, and those long masturbation scenes where Harth is just alone, stroking it, thinking about what the city has turned him into. Or maybe I imagined half of that. I was too busy replaying that titfuck scene where she squeezes him between those heavy boobs, drips spit on the tip, and whispers that she wants his cum inside, not on her chest. Then she rides him, loses the “virgin good girl” act in two thrusts, and you get that deep full creampie shot that almost looks too much. Which is exactly enough.

Luminary Protocol looks at you like a normal isekai porn VN, then slowly grabs you by the throat and reminds you it is actually a horror story where your cock is just another weak point. You wake up in this twisted copy of Earth, some weird mashup of school corridors, ruined city blocks and floating fantasy shit that should not be in the same sky. Gods and demons run the whole thing like a sick game show. You’re the typical male protagonist on paper, virgin, awkward, POV everywhere, but the game really likes to push you into ugly choices while your dick is still out. One second you’re flirting with a thick milf teacher in a half-collapsed school wing, watching her tits bounce in these smooth little animated loops while she’s grinding on your lap, and the next second the hallway behind her is crawling with something that used to be a girl and now has insect legs and too many teeth. It never fully lets you feel safe, even when your pants are off and her bra is on the floor and she’s guiding your hand up under her blouse for that slow groping scene that goes on just a bit too long. I played it like a coward, always picking the non-aggressive, “let’s talk about this” stuff, skipping any fight chance. No combat, just sneaking through scenes, hiding in classrooms, and somehow I still ended up knee deep in monster girls who wanted to ride me more than kill me. Or both, hard to say.

The sex itself swings around between kinda sweet and straight up fucked. There’s this school rooftop moment with your “totally not related” older woman from home, and the game leans hard on that taboo shit. She’s scolding you about dangerous magic while her blouse is open and she’s pressing your face into her tits because “you need comfort.” The camera goes low, she pulls your cock out, spits on it and does this lazy handjob with her soft annoyed voice in your ear, like she’s mad at you for getting hard but still jerking you off anyway. Later she pins you in a storage room, panties around one ankle, and you get full vaginal sex with her trying to keep quiet while the other students scream somewhere down the hall from whatever monster just spawned during a Convergence. The AI CG is bizarre in a good way, bodies look a bit too perfect and then you notice some tiny wrong detail in the background that makes your skin crawl. Sometimes the boobs are huge, stupid big, and the titfuck scenes turn into this soft, slow suffocation where the girl talks about “maybe letting you cum inside next time” because pregnancy here is not just a fetish, it has plot weight. One route actually hints that fucking the wrong girl bare could spawn some magic hybrid kid that the gods want, but I refused any raw creampie like I was playing a pacifist path of my own balls. I tell myself I am here for the story, the multiple endings, the weird alignment stuff, but I reloaded a save three times just to watch one oral scene again where the shy monster girl with horns and big tits practices kissing your shaft like it’s some dating sim homework. She melts a bit when you don’t push her, and the game quietly remembers that for later scenes. Or maybe I imagined that. Hard to tell when you’re half hard, half scared, and watching your choices drag you toward something that feels like both romance and a slow, wet apocalypse.

City like this always feels a bit horny and a bit dangerous at the same time. You start as this broke delivery guy, running boring routes, talking shit to yourself in the dark streets, wondering if rent or your sanity dies first. Then one very wrong encounter later, your throat is open, everything goes black, and when you wake up you’re a vampire with a hard-on and a second life you didn’t ask for. It’s not some sparkly teenage drama either. People bleed. Heads crack. The game doesn’t fade to black when someone gets ripped apart, it actually shows you. And in the middle of that mess you’re trying to figure out if you want to be the tragic romance type or just a complete bastard corrupting every girl who crosses your path. One moment you’re having a semi-sweet talk with a shy “good girl” virgin who trusts you because you saved her from some creep, next moment you’re pushing her down on a stained mattress, finger in her ass, making her choke on your cock and calling that “training”. The writing really leans into that: one path lets you act like a protective love interest, the other like a walking red flag with fangs. Both feel right for a vampire, honestly.

What makes it fun is that it’s not only click through text and watch boobs bounce. You wander the city like in a small adventure game, poking into alleys, shops, shady clubs, even some weird paranormal spots. You pick jobs, take quests, grind stats, unlock new powers. Get stronger, get richer, get more dangerous. Superpowers and corruption go hand in hand: you charm a milf long enough and suddenly she’s begging to be your personal blood bank, legs wide open while you decide if you want to cum in her pussy or in her ass. Some scenes start almost wholesome, like you just giving a massage, a bit of teasing, a slow handjob. Then toys appear. Vibrators, plugs, collars. You pull her hair, make her ride you until there is a sloppy creampie dripping down her thighs, and she thanks you like it’s a religious experience. There is this nice whiplash between male domination and female domination too. You think you’re in control, then an older vampire girl puts a heel on your chest, jerks you off nice and slow, stops right before you cum and tells you exactly whose pet you are now. The incest angle is handled in that porn logic way: everyone acts like they know it’s taboo but they just keep going, touching, groping, “accidentally” walking in during masturbation, turning family drama into porn logic romance. And yeah, there is prostitution, actual street girls, deals for blood and sex, sometimes both at once. Some routes let you keep things romantic, soft kisses, gentle vaginal sex, cuddling after. Others push you into being a complete pervert, using mind control to turn a decent woman into a cock drunk toy who offers anal just because you smiled at her. It’s messy and a bit trashy and also kind of addicting, like watching late night anime that suddenly went full hentai without telling anyone.

Angelica shows up in this city like she thinks life is finally going to calm down, and within five minutes you are watching people eye-fuck her in the hallway while you try to remember which key opens the damn inventory. She is 22, fresh grad, thinks she is smart, then gets sucked into this crime and family mess where everyone either wants to fuck her, use her, or both at same time. You start just helping her move in, checking some messages, a little masturbation scene in the new apartment if you push certain choices, and suddenly you are in the middle of some shady deal behind a strip club, staring at a guy who looks like a dilf version of a cartel accountant. The jump is wild but it somehow feels natural, like "yeah of course we went from unpacking boxes to blowjob in a car behind the bar." I got distracted at one point just opening every dialogue option to see who is secretly a creep, and surprise, most of them.

There is this thing the game does where it teases you with exhibition vibes all the time. Tiny skirt, no panties, camera lingering on her ass way too long while she walks through crowded street, some dude "accidentally" bumps into her and his hand stays on her hip for a second too long. You can lean into it or try to keep her more "good girl" but even when I tried to play her careful I still ended up in this scene where she is half naked behind a half closed door, moaning quietly, while some family member passes by the hallway and you just know if you click wrong they see everything. It turns into this weird mix of voyeur and exhibition, like you are watching and also making her the show for other people. Sometimes it felt hot, other times I was like "ok this is kinda messed up" then the next second there is anal on a leather couch and my brain just shuts up. The game calls it corruption, but it is really just you slowly finding out everyone around her is horny and slightly criminal or fully criminal. There is group sex, there is multiple penetration, stuff that hits fast once the story opens up, and when the interracial scenes hit they do not tiptoe around it, it is right in your face and pretty filthy. One of the best moments was this stripping scene where she is supposed to just "audition" and it escalates to oral and groping while another girl watches from the back room, half in the shadows. That little voyeur angle, plus the sound of cheap club music looping, somehow made it way hotter than it looked at first.

I kept thinking the game only cares about Angelica, but then the other playable characters show up and suddenly you jump into someone older, or into a guy, or into this milf type who is part of the family mess. The tone shifts when that happens. With her, scenes feel like "oops, I am in danger, also I am horny." With the others, it is more "I know exactly what I am doing and I am still a terrible person." There is one older man you control who walks into a massage place, and that whole sequence turns from casual talk to sexual harassment to full on prostitution-level negotiation in like three dialogue lines. The writing is not perfect, some phrases feel like they came from Google Translate, which is funny because my English is not even good and I still noticed it, but in sex scenes it weirdly helps, makes the dirty talk shorter and more direct. Creampies, anal, double penetration, that stuff is not hidden, when it goes there the camera stays and the sound design pushes it, with those wet sloppy sounds you pretend you do not like but you turn the volume up a bit. Oh and there is graphic violence that pops out of nowhere sometimes, like one moment you are deep in a blowjob scene in a car, next moment someone gets beaten halfway to death in a back alley and you wonder if you should have taken a different choice three scenes back. Only thing that annoyed me constantly was how clicky the UI feels in some menus, like the hitbox on one button is weirdly tiny and my fat mouse finger keeps missing it, and I never got used to that. Anyway, you go from masturbation in a lonely apartment to family drama, to stripping, to crime mystery, to group sex in some cramped room where everybody is sweating, sometimes in the span of what feels like ten clicks, and my brain kept going "one more scene then I stop" then I forgot what I was doing before I started playing.

College town sex drama with messy people, that is what this thing is, no fancy wrapping. You drop into campus life as this pretty normal guy, not a hero, not a loser, just someone who ends up in way too many bedrooms and way too many bad choices. Classes and exams exist mostly so the game can shove you into hallways, libraries and dorm corridors where clothes do not stay on very long. Girls in tight tops pretending they care about studying, guys pretending they care about friendship while staring at asses. The rival shows up early, that smug bastard with perfect hair who smiles like he already fucked half the dorm. He keeps nudging the story into cheating territory. Not in a soft “oops I tripped and landed on a dick” way, more like “I know your girl is weak when she drinks and I am going to prove it.” The game makes you watch it, too. A lot of scenes start with you as the voyeur, behind a cracked door or across the courtyard, listening to moans that might be for you. Or maybe not.

The cutscenes are where it gets fun and also kind of trashy, in a good porn way. You can feel the AI CG doing heavy lifting. Faces look a bit too smooth sometimes, like those Instagram filters, but the expressions when a shy girl finally opens her legs for another woman are surprisingly hot. There is a sequence in a shared dorm shower that really stands out: steam all over, towels barely hanging, two girls teasing each other with soap while the male MC is “accidentally” walking in. One of them notices him, does not say a thing, just keeps rubbing the other’s nipples, slow, while maintaining eye contact with you through the half-open curtain. That moment when the other girl realizes someone is watching and her thighs clamp together, but she still leans into the touch, that is the kind of corruption the game likes. It is not instant brainwashing, more like small decisions stacked until someone’s “good girl” act is completely ruined. And sometimes the camera cuts away right when you want that final close up, which annoys the hell out of me and then they never fix it in the next scene.

Sex variety is all over the place. You get classic dorm-room grinding with underwear tossed on the desk, lazy afternoon blowjob while some sad university music track plays from a laptop, and then it swings into full-on interracial scenes where the rival drags a drunk girl from a party to a quiet corner. The skin tones in those scenes actually look decent, especially compared to a lot of cheap porn games where darker characters look like plastic. Here, when your girl sneaks off to fuck someone else, you really see the difference between your body and his, and they lean into that. One late-night bar scene has your date slow dancing with you, then swapping partners with another couple, then hands wandering, then she ends up pressed against the wall with someone else’s fingers inside her while you stand there pretending it is all part of the “open-minded college vibe.” I liked the way the game lets you grope in crowded places too, like sliding your hand under a skirt in the back row of the lecture hall while the professor talks about something nobody cares about. Knocked my coffee over once during a long grinding scene, keyboard sticky for a week, still no dedicated “clean desk” option in settings and yes, I am bitter. Music is hit and miss, sometimes it nails this late-night chill mood that fits a slow lesbian make-out in a dorm bed, sometimes it loops a weird little upbeat track during a very serious cheating scene and kills the mood. But then you get a simple stripping sequence in a cramped dorm room, just your girl awkwardly dancing out of her sweater and bra while trying not to laugh, and suddenly it feels more real than half the “professional” erotic stuff on Steam. You kinda wish the game would slow down more often like that, right before it throws you back into spying on your not-so-faithful love interest as she rides someone else on a squeaky mattress with the door slightly open, like the whole corridor is invited to listen.

Hector walks back into Rannai like a guy who thought he was over his ex and then sees him in the gym locker room towel around his waist and suddenly nothing is over at all. That is the whole mood here. You play this chunky badger healer who looks soft and hardworking on the outside, but his brain is just full of old wolf dick memories and the smell of wet fur and morning mist. The town feels cozy at first, like something from a cute fantasy VN, but then the game keeps poking you with these little horny needles. There is always a hand lingering a bit longer, an accidental grope that is not accidental, eyes catching you through half closed doors. I swear half the time I was reading, I was also staging it in my head like a burlesque show. Hector in a healer robe that slips off one shoulder, a big wolf watching from the dark corner of the stage while I slow turn my ass toward the lights. Yeah, it hits like that.

Cadgan is the reason your brain melts. He used to be the smaller reckless pup, now he is this big wolf wall with heavy shoulders, cold eyes and a quiet "do not touch me" aura that just screams "touch me anyway." Every scene with him has this push and pull vibe. He pretends he is distant, you pretend you are just there to heal people, and the game pretends it is going to stay wholesome. It never does. You get these tiny teasing moments where his paw brushes your hip when it really doesn’t have to, or he pins you in a narrow corridor because someone else is passing and wow what a coincidence his chest is pressed hard against your back. As a dancer I kept thinking: this would be a perfect routine. Low red lights, fog on the floor, me in badger stripes grinding against an invisible wolf, slow strip while some fantasy flute plays completely wrong music for what I am doing. The story has real romance under all the filth too, like awkward conversations about the past, little jealous flashes when other guys flirt with you, but it never forgets to be horny. There is voyeur stuff where people are way too casual about half open curtains, groping that starts "for medical reasons", and asses so big they might need their own health potion. I will only complain about one thing: at one point a character keeps touching Hector’s tail in every single scene and nobody comments on it and now it lives rent free in my head with no closure at all. Anyway, I closed the browser, opened it again, and my first thought was: okay, what if they add a DLC where Hector does "house calls" in the forest and the trees themselves get handsy. That is when you know a game got under your skin and probably into your underwear.