You wake up in Rick’s garage, half hungover, pants around your ankles, and he just shrugs and opens some glitchy portal that looks like he coded it while drunk on cheap vodka. Next second you’re dumped into this fucked up version of their universe where everything is familiar but just a bit too wet, too soft, too shiny. The first thing you see is Beth’s ass in yoga pants, bent over the kitchen counter, arguing with nobody because Jerry doesn’t exist here. Or he exists but not as a man. You, apparently, are the stand‑in loser. This world is stacked with huge tits and thick asses walking around like it’s normal, and you’re somehow the only guy with working dick, but the joke is you’re broke, useless and everyone treats you like background noise until you prove you can do more than jerk off in the bathroom.

The game plays like somebody smashed an rpg with a horny sandbox and forgot to clean up the code. You wander around the Smith house, sometimes the dialogue hits, sometimes it looks like the dev wrote it on a bus. Beth flips from “responsible doctor mom” to “thirsty milf ready to ride your face” depending on your choices, and it’s messy in a good way. First time she dragged me into the garage and climbed on top, the camera bugged and her tits clipped into my forehead, looked like I was getting smothered by two balloons full of milk. Still hot, though. Summer is worse and better at same time. She acts like she’s too cool for you, glued to her phone, calling you creepy stepdad, then suddenly there’s this event where she’s stuck doing squats in these tiny booty shorts and if you picked the right options earlier she just casually spreads her legs on your lap like that’s normal family bonding. There’s a mini “quest” where you have to grind a bit of cash from random odd jobs, then blow it all in one night at some sketchy bar because a cop with big tits promises “special treatment” in the bathroom stall and then crashes the scene halfway when the wrong variable triggers. I had her talking like Beth for one line. I laughed way too hard.

What I liked is how dirty some scenes are without pretending to be romantic. Vaginal stuff is front and center, no ten‑minute build up, you can just end up balls‑deep in Beth on the couch while the TV shows some static cartoon and the UI text overlaps the cum animation. Sometimes you get stuck in this loop where you’re grinding affection points and money at same time and it feels like a shitty mobile game you secretly enjoy on the toilet. Sometimes the pacing just breaks and you go from jerked‑off loser to pussy magnet in two choices. It’s not stable, not clean, the porn logic is dumb, and the whole “nut your way home” thing already doesn’t make sense five minutes in, but when Summer is riding you in her messy room with her big tits bouncing and the game forgets to fade out the footsteps sound from the hallway, you kinda stop caring that half of it feels like a bug report waiting to happen.

Tifa in a dirty Asgar back alley is honestly one of those ideas that sounds like a shitpost you see on Twitter, then you actually click and suddenly you are sitting there, pants half down, thinking about ethics. The game throws you into this narrow, trashy street corner where Tifa’s “chance encounter” is not really chance at all, it feels more like the city itself is horny and bored and wants to see what happens if you poke her morality with a stick. You move around with simple point & click stuff, nothing fancy, but the way it uses that simplicity is what stuck with me. Clicking a trash can to see if there is something useful in there, then realizing the thing you find is not an item, but a decision that will push her closer to being a public slut or staying that slightly sad “good girl who knows better” is weirdly heavy. At one moment I was carefully choosing polite dialogue, trying to keep her dignity, and five minutes later I was letting her bend over near a flickering neon sign while some random nobody jerked off watching her and the game treated it like a natural escalation, not a sudden “corruption level 100” jump. It creeps up on you. You think you still control the line, and then a new option appears like “maybe flash your tits, nobody will notice,” and of course the whole alley notices.

What really messes with your head is how it uses those AI CG images. Most AI porn games feel like a Frankenstein of mismatched faces and extra fingers, but here the Tifa knockoff is close enough to tick the nostalgia brain, and different enough you start reading her like an alternate universe version. Her boobs are weaponized, obviously, but not only in the “big tits for clickbait” way. You get a scene where she is cornered near a broken streetlight, and two dudes are arguing over who gets to “check if she is really as soft as she looks,” and the camera shifts between her embarrassed face and that tight top about to give up on physics. It feels wrong and hot at the same time, like you are participating in a stupid social experiment about how many times you will click “let them touch a bit more” before you feel like trash. Then the game throws Aerith into the mix and suddenly there is this weird soft romance flavor sliding under all the sleaze. One path has you focusing on Tifa’s spiral into exhibitionism, letting her discover she actually likes being watched, like properly likes it, moaning louder on purpose because she knows there might be someone behind the window. Another bit switches you over to a male POV, looking at her and Aerith almost like collectibles, and I hated how efficient that perspective is. It makes you treat them as reward screens, then suddenly there is a little tender gesture between them, a kiss that is not just porn logic, and your brain has to adjust: oh, shit, maybe they feel something too. The romance is clumsy but honest, like two thirsty people in a city that only respects power and skin. I wish the UI wasn’t so stiff and some of the dialogue didn’t sound like Google Translate drunk on cheap wine, but in a funny way it fits the whole “morals falling apart in a forgotten alley” vibe. It feels broken in the same way the characters are broken. And yeah, that text choice that moves half a pixel when you hover? I’m still irrationally angry about that.

Didn’t think I’d even bother with another “casting couch” parody, but WaifuHub kinda trapped me there for a while. It’s one of those browser things that pretends to be ironic, except it isn’t, or maybe it is, I don’t even know anymore. You play as the guy behind the camera, interviewing all these anime girls you’ve seen a million times before - 2B shows up all confident and stiff, Raphtalia’s nervous like she’s in a real audition, and Lucoa just… well, she’s Lucoa, she doesn’t care what anyone thinks. The voice acting’s weirdly uneven, and sometimes the moans cut out at random, which somehow made it more real? Like catching some clumsy home-recording vibe. But yeah, the animations hit that point between funny and hot. You’ll laugh when Galko starts her self-introduction too seriously and then forgets she’s supposed to be seducing you, and then it hits you - you’re actually into this.

What got me wasn’t even the sex scenes (well, okay, some of them). It’s that stupid fake dialogue right before things go wild. Meiko saying she’s “totally professional” and then two sentences later losing it on camera - it’s dumb but oddly human. I kept noticing small stuff: the sound of sandals scraping, the way hands twitch when the pace changes. The dev probably didn’t plan half of that; it’s just dirty accident magic. Though I swear the skip button hates me - it freezes every other time I touch it. Doesn’t matter though, since you end up watching everything twice anyway. And Cheelai? She breaks the fourth wall once and it ruined me, I laughed so hard I forgot I was supposed to jerk off.

Somewhere around Mitsuki’s scene I caught myself thinking about how strange it is that we build whole universes of desire around characters that started out as jokes for teenage boys. Then I gave up thinking because Mina’s turn came and - yeah. Animation’s rough around the edges, lines are bad, the logic is nonsense, but damn if it doesn’t feel alive in that broken way cheap porn sometimes does. I still can’t figure out why 2B blushes differently depending on the camera angle. Maybe it’s intentional. Probably not. Doesn’t matter.

Orange Smash! feels like somebody took a lazy walk into a creepy forest, tripped over their own dick, and decided to stay there because the girl who found them was way too hot to leave. It is one of those short, horny visual novels that knows exactly what it wants to do and does not pretend to be deep, but somehow it still has little emotional stabs that catch you off guard. You meet Yuma in this empty, almost dead-looking forest, everything quiet, no people, just you, trees, and this girl with ridiculous chest physics and a smile that looks like trouble. She talks like she already knows you, touches you like you are already her toy, and the game never really explains her properly. Not in a lore way, anyway. Which is kind of nice. You just accept that this monster-looking girl with huge tits shows up, teases the fuck out of you, and that is your life now. I played it on my phone while half-lying on the couch, one hand awkwardly holding the screen, the other hand very much busy, and honestly the mobile aspect matters more than it should. It is the kind of thing you open between checking Telegram and Reddit and then suddenly you are stuck watching her slowly slide her tongue along the MC in this long oral scene that lasts just enough to make you forget you were even “playing” anything.

What I really liked is how Yuma is written like a horny gremlin instead of some perfect anime waifu. She jokes, she mocks you a bit, she knows you are staring at her boobs and she uses it. There is this moment early on where she pretends she is giving you a “reward” for surviving the forest, sits way too close, leans in so her breasts press into the MC’s chest, and just keeps talking casually about nothing important, like she is stretching out the moment on purpose. It is obvious she wants to fuck, it is obvious you want to fuck, but she keeps you right at the edge of it, brushing your thigh, whispering in your ear, her tail kind of wrapping around your leg like she is claiming you. It is slow, but in a good way. Then the actual sex scenes go the other direction, like “ok, you waited, now take everything at once.” The first time she goes down on you, she looks up with this smug face that actually made me stop tapping for a second. There is something really satisfying about how she enjoys it too, not just doing service. She drools, she laughs a bit when you twitch, she talks with her mouth still messy. Later, when she climbs on top and just sinks down, there is this quiet line she drops, something like “you are not going anywhere now,” and it hits both as horny and a little scary. In a good, “I live in your phone and own your dick now” kind of way. The creampie stuff is straight up shameless, warm and sticky and drawn with way more love than some of the backgrounds. I wish the forest had more variation, to be honest, but I kind of forgot about that once she started bouncing on top of the MC, her breasts moving like they had their own personality. It is messy, it is focused almost only on you and her, and that single track mindset actually makes it relaxing. You open game, you meet weird lewd girl, you get teased, you cum inside her, you stare at the last CG a bit too long, you close game, you think “yeah, I might open that again later” and then you go back to scrolling like nothing happened.

You start as this ex–special forces guy who suddenly feels completely useless, which is kind of funny because he’s ripped, trained, all that macho stuff, and then some slime girl with tits bigger than his head just shrugs off rifle fire like it’s nothing. The world is getting chewed up by these dungeons that keep popping open like zits, monsters spilling out, magic everywhere, normal logic out the window. Then the whole “Awakened” thing kicks in, and he basically goes from soldier to magic freak with a hard-on, trying to clean up the mess in a way the army never trained him for. It’s not a heroic story in the usual sense, more like: “okay, the planet is screwed, might as well fuck my way through the problem while I’m at it.” The game leans into that. You go from room to room in these dungeons, talking to girls who really should be your enemies, but somehow they’re all stacked like hentai convention mascots and have faces that melt into ahegao the second your clothes come off.

The tone is weirdly calm at first. There’s this slow pace where you wander around the hub, poke different events, check who’s hanging out where, and it feels like a chill fantasy sandbox with magic and politics and people coping with monsters at the door. Then you stumble into a chamber and you’re suddenly pinning a demoness with wings and a ridiculous ass against a wall, stuffing her full until she’s moaning with that over-the-top tongue-out expression. The scenes are animated just enough, with these 3D-style CGs that loop and shift angles, and the dev is clearly horny for big breasts because every woman looks like gravity is just a suggestion. I like how the dungeon itself is part of the story, not just a corridor to spam fights. You discover weird rules, like doors that only open if you “satisfy” the guardian, or a cursed room that turns a regular battle into a domination scene where she tries to ride you into submission, then ends up getting creampied so hard the magic seal breaks. It’s stupid, but in a good way. And the facial detail when they hit that ahegao point? Uncomfortably good.

The slow-burn parts shine the most. Talking to a monster girl you fought last time and now she’s in your base, pretending she’s there against her will, while clearly waiting for you to take charge again. You learn bits of how their world connects to ours: some of them were human, some were born from the dungeon itself, and everybody’s sort of stuck in this war where sex and power are completely tangled. Couple of times I wished the UI didn’t hide the damn interaction spots in the hub because I spent like ten minutes circling around a tavern just to trigger one scene with a sorceress whose robe doesn’t even pretend to close over her boobs. That annoyed me and then I forgot because the next thing was her bent over a magic circle, gasping while you pump her full, white dripping all over the glowing runes. The domination angle is nice too, since you can play the protagonist as someone who enjoys having control in bed, even when the girl is technically a monster who could snap him in half. The writing isn’t “high literature”, but honestly it fits. Feels like reading a horny webnovel where the author really likes describing asses, and bodies, and that moment right after the creampie where her belly twitches and she pants and stares at you like “again?” and you’re like, yeah, obviously.

I didn’t expect a game about running Leblanc again to make me feel this weird mix of nostalgia and filthy excitement, but here we are. You’re back behind that tiny counter, coffee grinder humming like it’s pretending not to hear the moans from upstairs. The girls drift in one by one - older now, sharper around the edges - and there’s something so painfully intimate in how they talk to you, like every conversation could end in an argument or a kiss. The writing isn’t afraid of silence either; some dialogues just sit there, uncomfortable, until someone says something foolish and suddenly clothes start coming off. It’s both tender and obscene. I kinda hate that I love it.

The management part doesn’t even pretend to be realistic. You wipe tables, brew coffee, flirt, rinse, repeat - but then out of nowhere she’s leaning over the counter and whispering something that makes your hand slip on the mug handle. That small animation? Pure evil. Like it knows exactly what kind of attention you’re giving the screen. The sandbox structure helps though; it gives you space to do nothing, which somehow makes the sexy moments hit harder. There’s this little sound effect when affection goes up, a soft chime, and I swear it’s addictive like a dopamine drip. I wish the CG scenes weren’t locked behind such arbitrary stat checks, but maybe that’s part of the charm: earning indulgence through tedium. Or maybe I’m just rationalizing my own thirst.

There’s one night where everything slows down - no hints, no grinding, just her voice low and rough, saying things that almost sound like apologies. That single scene made the whole thing click for me. The lewdness stops being just porn and turns into something strangely personal, almost pathetic in its honesty. I don’t know if that was on purpose, probably not, but it worked. Play it like you’d sip cold coffee after closing time - half bitter, half sweet, all wrong. Don’t rush anything. Let it wreck your pacing.

I didn’t expect a porn VN to remind me of old YouTube prank videos and shitty MSN chats at the same time, but this one kinda does. Early 2000s vibe hits right away: chunky phones, ugly clothes, random posters that look like they were stolen from Limewire, and three girls who are absolutely not ready for “professional” porn at all, which is why I liked them. They’re messy, horny, loud, and half the time they’re laughing in the middle of a blowjob like it’s a blooper reel. You’re this clueless fisherman with big himbo energy, trying to pretend you know what you’re doing while these girls drag you into making “content.” Every scene feels like a mix of awkward home video and real romance, like someone put softcore cable TV and a shitty cam show in a blender and forgot the lid.

What really made me stay was how the game treats the lewd stuff like it’s normal life, not some sacred ritual. One moment she’s joking about your clothes smelling like fish, next moment she’s sliding down to your lap, stroking you slow with one hand, still talking trash about your haircut. There’s this scene on a shitty old couch where two of the girls are arguing about camera angles, and you’re sitting there with your dick out, and then one just shrugs, climbs on your lap and starts grinding while the other keeps filming and giggling. It feels like you’re all just playing around, but then the animation hits that perfect rhythm and her ass is bouncing in your face and it suddenly gets way too hot. Bodies look thick in a good way, tits that actually move when they get grabbed, asses that don’t look copy-pasted. Sometimes the faces go a bit weird during certain angles, then the next shot is gorgeous and you forget you were just judging it two seconds ago.

I like how the group scenes never feel like some cold porn studio script. There’s one moment where all three girls are crowded around you in this tiny room, joking about “auditions,” and they start teasing one by one. One is rubbing her chest against your back, another is on her knees working your shaft with slow, lazy strokes, the third is just there to whisper the filthiest things in your ear like she’s trying to brainwash you. It’s cute and fucked up at the same time. They’ll laugh, shove each other around, smack your ass for no reason, then suddenly get serious and look at you like you belong to them and only them. That’s the part that hits my yandere brain, honestly. They pretend it’s all fun and business, but the way they look jealous when someone else gets more attention? Yeah. If this was real life, somebody would slash someone’s tires. Sex scenes feel like they’re halfway between a joke and a confession, and you’re stuck in the middle, leaking all over their hands while they decide how far they want to go on camera this time. I kept pausing just to stare at their bodies like a creep and then pretending it was for “plot,” but whatever, that’s their fault for making it this horny and stupid and sweet at the same time.

You wander through this dead, sunburned Egypt where the sand is full of bones and broken tech, and somehow your biggest problem keeps becoming “who am I fucking tonight and how hard.” The game throws you in as this desert scavenger who is supposed to be hunting relics and old-world junk, but every time you push deeper into the ruins you just keep stumbling into more messed up, horny situations. One second you are negotiating with some half-feral tribal girl who wants water, the next second she is on her knees between your legs in a crumbling temple, sand dust falling from the ceiling while she gags on your cock and tries to keep eye contact like it’s some kind of ritual. The story pretends to care about fate, old gods, this artifact that can twist the future and all that, but the real tension is always “do you ruin this person, or do you pretend to be her savior while still using her body.” It feels wrong and hot at the same time, like you are playing with a broken toy that still smiles at you.

What actually keeps it interesting is how many different flavors of messed up it has. You have girls who melt the second you humiliate them in front of others, being dragged by a collar through a ruined street while people stare. You have this strict, icy woman who acts like she owns you, spitting orders and making you lick her feet, only for you to later chain her up in some underground chamber and fuck her until she cries and drools milk all over herself. One girl is shy and flat, another stacked and leaking, and the game really doesn’t care if you want to turn the whole ruined pyramid complex into your personal harem, breeding them, sharing them with your allies, or letting them “serve” as slaves in some filthy market. Sometimes the sex is slow and almost tender, bodies pressed together on dusty sheets in a half-collapsed apartment, sometimes it jumps into full-on horror, with blood, screaming, and you still hard while something awful drips down her thighs. You get pissing scenes in dirty showers, public use in alleys, group scenes in torch-lit chambers where everybody is sweaty and no one really knows who is fucking who anymore. There are moments where you feel like a monster, forcing a girl to strip in front of her own family, or making a daughter watch what you do to her mother, and the game just lets that hang there, no hand holding, no “good boy” message, just your choices and the way these broken people cling to you anyway. Then five minutes later you are clicking through some dialog that feels like it came from a hentai shitpost and laughing because it is so blunt and stupid. It is rough, filthy, sometimes too much, sometimes not enough, but it sticks in your head like the taste of sweat and sand on someone’s skin.

Guy sees one weird ad on his phone, taps it like an idiot, and suddenly his whole life is tits, rules, and women who talk to him like he’s a toy they bought on Amazon. That’s pretty much the vibe of Femdom Academy. It feels like one of those shady mobile apps that tries to flirt with you in push notifications, except this time the flirting turns into a full school system built around you being the rare guy in a country full of horny, bossy women who think “consent form” is just a warm up. The setting is this strict academy where you’re the male transfer student, and every hallway is a trap. You’re staring up at teachers with big tits pressed against the desk, classmates who pretend to be sweet girls but tighten the metaphorical collar the second you say something stupid, and prefect-types who show up after classes to check if you did your “obedience homework”. Half the time you’re trying to be smooth and spit some pickup line like you’re on Bumble, half the time you’re on your knees wondering how the hell a math quiz turned into a blowjob test with a vibrator involved.

What I liked a lot is how the game actually lets you mess up your “game”. You try to be charming, throw out a line you’d use on Tinder, and instead of a cheesy romance answer you get a sharp smile and, boom, she’s pushing your head right into her thigh and telling you exactly how you’re going to make up for that cheesy shit. There’s this scene in a study room, for example, where you can try to compliment a girl’s ass in a cocky way. If you aim it right, she leans back in her chair, spreads her legs slow, pulls a toy from her bag like it’s just a pen, and starts teasing herself while making you watch. If you aim it wrong, she calls over another girl, they both sit on your face one after the other and keep talking about your “presentation skills” like it’s a normal group project. The whole POV thing hits harder here because the camera keeps you low, looking up at their thighs, their hands in your hair, drool and lipstick and that slight cruel smile when they know they’ve got you. There’s a lesbian angle running in the background too, some girls playing with each other while using you as furniture, and you catch tiny glimpses of jealousy or softness when they think you’re not looking. But every time you think “oh, she’s actually nice”, she tightens a collar, grabs your chin and makes you hold eye contact while she uses a vibrator on you until your legs shake. It’s rough, a bit crazy, sometimes emotional in a weird way, and very obviously about you being the rare dick in a world of confident women who want everything from handjobs in the locker room to full-on group scenes in the dorm, on their terms, at their pace, with your role locked in as the willing, horny, slightly overwhelmed toy who keeps coming back for more.