Some games try to pretend they are normal stories that just happen to have sex in them. This one doesn’t even bother, it just locks you in a house where every “guest” at the door is a walking problem with big tits, a fat ass, and probably some kind of monster bullshit going on behind her smile. You’re basically the dumb human who ended up with weird powers and now has to “inspect” each girl to see if she’s paranormal or safe. Of course the inspection is not like showing IDs. It starts all polite, some teasing, flirty questions, then suddenly her mouth is on your cock and you’re trying to remember if you’re supposed to be checking her aura or just not nut too fast. The horny part and the detective part kind of step on each other in a fun way. Sometimes you actually want to get to the truth of what the girl is, sometimes you just want to let the monster girl with the thick thighs hypnotize the shit out of you and ride you until your brain restarts.

The vibe is lazy in a good way, like a sandbox where you just open the door, pick who to mess with, see how far you can push things before it goes sideways. One time I tried to act all confident, used my powers to push into a girl’s mind, and she just snapped back, pinned me to the wall with one hand, and made me eat her out until my jaw hurt. Then she kissed me like she owned me and I kinda liked it but also felt like I lost at a game I didn’t know the rules of. The female domination here isn’t just “she rides you on top”. Some of them treat you like a toy, some like a pet, some like a partner they might actually trust if you don’t fuck it up. When you finally convince one of them she can stay inside your house, it hits different, because now she’s in your space, wandering around in her underwear, using her superpowers to do dumb stuff like float your phone out of reach while you’re trying to check Discord. And of course if you piss her off, suddenly blowjob inspection turns into “I’m going to sit on your face and read your thoughts until you beg properly”. It sort of trains you to pay attention, not just spam through dialog. Which is funny, because sometimes the writing repeats a bit and I still clicked anyway, then complained in my own head about it and kept playing.

Porn-wise it ramps up quick. One minute she’s just leaning forward, pressing those big tits together while she pretends to answer your questions, next minute she’s on her knees, drool sliding down your shaft, eyes a bit glowing, whispering shit into your mind while her tongue works your tip. Some girls are playful, they teasingly stroke you with just fingertips, kiss the head, pull back, ask “are you sure you’re human?” like that’s the important part while your cock is throbbing out of control. Others just go full hunger mode, deepthroat, spit, messy sounds, then climb on and sink down on you like they’ve been waiting centuries. There’s this one inspection where you’re supposed to check if her body is completely human, so she makes you “test every inch”. Hands on her ass, fingers between her legs, sliding inside while she grinds back against your palm and talks right into your thoughts about how easy you are to control. You’re half investigating, half just getting milked. And when more girls start sticking around, it stops being just one-on-one. You walk into a room and two of them are already arguing over who gets your cock first, one offering a slow, sloppy blowjob while the other promises to use her powers to squeeze you tighter from the inside. It doesn’t even feel fair, but that’s kind of the point. You’re the guy with powers, yet every time you end up flat on your back, buried in pussy, covered in lipstick and bite marks, wondering if you accidentally invited the wrong monster into your home. Not that you’ll kick her out.

Gohan trying to be a normal guy and failing in the horniest way possible is honestly the whole mood here. He’s supposed to focus on studies, on being this good half-saiyan boy, and instead you’re wandering around in this messy little sandbox of temptation where every “oops, I walked into the wrong room” somehow turns into tits, ass, or someone’s marriage getting way too flexible. It starts innocent enough: you’re just talking, running errands, feeling that classic awkward Gohan vibe. Then suddenly you’re in front of a MILF with a ridiculous chest, her clothes just barely staying up, and the dialogue takes that one tiny step from “oh, you’re such a nice boy” to “close the door behind you.” The game makes it feel slow-burn, but then you look back and realize you went from tutoring to raw fucking in like three scenes.

The parody angle actually hits different if you watched Dragon Ball growing up. Seeing Gohan use super strength for something other than punching villains, like holding a woman in mid-air while you rail her from behind, is stupid in the best way. You get those cheesy romance beats where you’re “helping” a woman with her problems, and then it quietly turns into cheating, like it’s just one more side quest. One moment you’re talking about training and peace, the next you’re balls deep in some big ass, her moans looping while your brain half-recognizes the hairstyle from the show. The animated scenes feel like those old hentai clips you’d find on random websites, not perfectly smooth but with just enough jiggle in big tits and that sloppy back-and-forth motion that makes you mute Chrome and lean in. Sometimes the animation is a bit stiff, but somehow that roughness makes it more like a dirty fan project your friend “totally didn’t spend months on.” I still don’t like the tiny UI buttons though, my mouse kept missing stuff and I got annoyed for like 5 seconds then forgot because someone bent over in front of me.

Android 18 here is dangerous in a different way. You know she could kill you with one hand, and the game kind of leans into that. The way she looks at you, the slightly cold lines that still end with her spreading her legs, it feels like you’re crossing a line you shouldn’t. Her scenes hit harder since it blends that controlled, robot-like calm with really nasty stuff like getting fucked until her composure breaks. In one route you’re basically collecting women around Gohan, turning this hero into the center of a harem without him even acting like a typical hentai protagonist. He still talks like Gohan, shy, polite, almost blushing, but you keep choosing options that drag him deeper into this secret life of vaginal sex, anal experiments, married women sneaking off, and soft little romance touches that make it dirtier instead of sweeter. It’s funny, I wanted more “serious” adventure parts at first, more superpowers and big fights, but each time the screen shook and clothes came off, I completely lost that thought and just listened to the breathing sounds, like an ASMR track that starts with light whispers and ends with someone choking on your cock. I kinda wish they'd fix some transitions between scenes, they feel a bit jumpy, but they probably never will and somehow that fits this whole messy, horny universe just fine.

Game drops you in this not-quite-our-world city where everything looks familiar until someone casually rips a guy in half and nobody blinks. You play this “hero” who is basically what happens if Superman stopped pretending to be nice and just did whatever gave him a hard-on. He’s invincible, knows it, and the story never shuts up about that, which is kind of the point. One moment you’re saving some chick from a mugger, next moment you’re shoving the mugger’s face through a wall, there’s teeth and blood everywhere, and she’s staring at you with that shocked open-mouth look that’s halfway between fear and “fuck me now”. That whole corruption vibe is strong here: women start out scared, confused, pretending they still have morals, and a few “rescues” later they’re begging to be used, cheeks smeared with cum and mascara, while bodies are still cooling in the background. The game doesn’t even pretend to be tasteful. You’ll have scenes where you punch a dude so hard his guts spray the alley, then it cuts right to the girl with an ahegao face while you rail her against the same wall, blood still dripping. Real romantic atmosphere.

Art style is funny in a good way. It looks like the dev got halfway between “serious superhero comic” and “horny shitpost” and just said screw it, we’re going with this. Big tits everywhere, like gravity is just a rumor. Faces go from normal to full ahegao with drool strings and crossed eyes the second you start fucking them harder, and some of the transitions are almost too honest. One moment she’s humiliated, crying, telling you to stop, next frame her tongue is out and she’s clenching around you while you threaten to drop her from the sky. Animated loops are short but nasty in the right way: rough anal with her nails scratching the floor, sloppy oral where she’s choking and still forced to look up at you, creampie shots where you can literally see it leaking out while she’s trying to catch her breath. There’s cheating stuff too, of course. Boyfriend shows up, tries to act like a man, you casually break his arm like it’s a breadstick, then fuck his girl in front of him while he screams. Game really likes that humiliation angle, sometimes it overdoes it to the point you just stare at the screen like “bro, chill”, but then five clicks later you’re watching another pussy-stretching close-up and magically you don’t care anymore.

Story pretends to talk about power and responsibility, but let’s be real, it’s about power and pussy. You get choices, but most of them boil down to “do you want to be an asshole” or “do you want to be a worse asshole”, and honestly that fits the setting. There’s a scene where you fly a girl to the top of a building, clothes half torn from the speed, she’s clinging to you for dear life, and instead of anything heroic, you just bend her over the edge and fuck her while she cries that she’s scared of falling. Camera zooms in on her face, tears mixing with drool, then zooms out so you see the city lights below and your hand grabbing her hair like she’s just a handle. Another moment, after a particularly nasty fight with some powered thug, there’s gore everywhere, pieces of him on the pavement, and the game just hard-cuts from his brain matter to you forcing his girlfriend on her knees in the same puddle, making her suck you off while her mascara runs into the blood. That’s the whole tone: hero logo on your chest, brutality on one side of the screen, holes getting filled on the other. It’s loud, trashy, mean, and doesn’t fake any “wholesome” bullshit. Honestly, if I could ban boring PG superhero plots from the entire genre and replace them with this messy, horny disaster, I would.

Game feels like somebody mashed a porn comic, a goofy superhero show and one of those messy family dramas from Netflix, then said “yeah ok, what if everyone was hot and kind of a pervert.” You start as this dude who’s basically the walking center of gravity in a house full of ridiculous curves and way too little shame. There’s school stuff on the side, but it’s mostly there so the girls can wear tight uniforms, bend over desks and pretend they’re focusing on homework while you’re staring at their asses. The whole thing has that 3D render vibe where boobs are just slightly too perfect and every milf’s butt looks like it was optimized in Excel for maximum surface area. I kind of respect that, professionally.

The story is split in a weird data way in my head: “story mode” is your main plotline with the incest harem, twins, powers, family secrets, etc., and “free roam” is like the sandbox dashboard where your KPI is “how many holes filled concurrently.” You pick which girl’s storyline to go deep into first, and that actually changes the emotional tempo. Go with the milf aunt early and the game instantly feels like a corruption chart trending up: slow teasing, long eye contact at breakfast, her walking around with a towel that keeps almost slipping, then suddenly she’s riding you on the couch while some dumb sitcom plays in the background. Pick the twin route first and it’s more like a broken A/B test where both variants are just “sisters competing to see who can drain you faster.” One scene has you “helping them study” and you end up with one sister under the table sucking you off while the other pretends to quiz you, cheeks red, nipples poking through her top. The tension is less subtle there, more “everyone in this house is two seconds from a gangbang.”

Superpowers pop up in a way that’s actually kind of funny. Not deep Marvel-level, more like “hey, I can freeze time long enough to pull down the teacher’s shirt and stare at her tits while she’s stuck mid-sentence” or using some mind trick to nudge a shy girl into showing you what her panties look like. That voyeur angle is everywhere. You catch the milf masturbating in the shower, spying from a crack in the door. Or you watch the two girls making out on the bed, hands all over each other, one grinding her thigh between the other’s legs, and you just sit there like some creepy analyst, tracking their moans, waiting for the right second to walk in and “help.” Then the game lets you replay that same scene later in free roam and push it harder: add anal, swap positions, bring a third girl, turn a soft lesbian moment into full-blown group sex where faces are messy and nobody’s even pretending to be innocent anymore. I wish the UI for the free roam scenes was less clicky and more like a flow, but it’s not going to change and whatever, I got used to it.

Sex variety is nuts, by the way. One minute you’re doing slow, almost romantic vaginal with your “relative” on her bed, her legs wrapped around you, whispering shit she should absolutely not be saying to a family member. Next moment you’re in a kind of half-joking threesome with her and another girl, choking on laughs and dick at the same time, cum dripping down her chin while the other girl holds her hair like it’s some friendly team activity. Anal shows up often enough that it feels like anyone over 30 in this universe just defaults to offering up their ass once they trust you. There’s this late scene where you pin the milf against the wall, her huge tits bouncing while you push into her ass, her moans loud enough you’re sure the “kids” can hear, and she just doesn’t care anymore. Lesbian content is not optional; girls lick each other like they’ve been waiting their whole lives for you to leave the room so they can finally taste some pussy. One of my favorite moments is in the school setting, on a rooftop, where two girls are pressed together, kissing slow, one sliding her hand down the other’s skirt, wet sounds way too loud for outside. You show up, they pretend to be shy for two lines, then you’re balls-deep in one while the other rides your face, both of them held up by your “mysterious power” like some messed up vertical bar chart of naked bodies.

The humor is stupid in a good way. Characters throw horny jokes around all the time, like the milf calling your cock her “favorite workout equipment,” or one twin telling the other to “share the resource, I saw him first but I don’t mind concurrency.” It makes the hardcore scenes feel like you’re in on some private joke, not just clicking porn stills. At the same time, some transitions between serious story and horny comedy feel like someone forgot to switch tabs in their brain. You go from tragic family secret to a titjob gag in two lines. Speaking of titjobs, they look great even though sometimes the camera angles are a little weird, like the dev really loves close-ups of nipples more than faces. Not a crime, just funny. And the violence tag? It spikes here and there when the fantasy plot kicks in: a fight where powers clash, blood on the ground, then directly after that you’re comforting a bruised girl with your tongue between her thighs because that’s how this universe handles trauma apparently. There’s no NTR, which I kind of appreciate as someone who likes clean ownership in his mental dashboard. Everything belongs to the main dude, period, including the twins, the milf, the schoolgirls, the side chicks. It’s pure harem math, and the game leans hard into that, like a line going straight up on a chart that probably should worry somebody in a real-life ethics meeting. But here, it just makes sense.

You’re in a classic magic-and-knights world, but the game doesn’t really waste time pretending you’re some legendary hero. You’re just this kinda average dude who had the weird luck of growing up next to the most overpowered girl in the realm, the Saintess. Everyone worships her, prays to her, expects miracles, all that holy stuff. You? You know what she looked like with mud all over her dress when she was eight and crying because she lost some dumb toy. That’s the whole vibe. Publicly she’s this shining untouchable goddess, privately she’s a bratty, horny, emotional mess who keeps dragging you into situations where you’re stuck between protecting her and trying not to pop a boner. It doesn’t help that magic and demons and all that fantasy trash keep throwing you into danger, then two scenes later you’re in a candle-lit room with her on your lap, stroking you with this mix of innocence and “I know exactly what I’m doing.” The game loves going from “the world might end” to “her soft hand is wrapped around your cock and she’s whispering your name with that cute little tremble” in about five clicks.

Because yeah, it’s not just teasing and jokes. There’s a real focus on building this thing where you two are basically a messed-up holy power couple. She’s supposed to be this pure and sacred symbol, but she’s also the girl who grew up sharing a bed with you when storms scared her, clinging to you, kissing your cheek, slowly sliding into more. The fact she’s your childhood friend is not just background text, it actually shows up in how she acts when she kisses you for real the first time, or when she goes down on you, clearly nervous but totally determined, drooling on your shaft while her eyes look up at you like you’re the only person who really knows her. And yeah, that whole “we grew up like siblings” tension is very much there, the game doesn’t pretend it’s anything else. Especially when she starts playing with magic during sex, using little spells to pin you, heal you while riding you, or make you feel every little squeeze inside her even more. The humor is all over too, like you’re getting lectured by some knight about honor, while five minutes later you’re fucking her silly behind a holy statue, trying not to laugh as she bites your shoulder to keep from moaning your name so loud the whole temple hears. It’s messy, horny, kind of wrong, kind of sweet, and that weird mix is exactly what works here.

Grief hits different when you come back to a town that already feels a bit wrong. Streets that used to feel small and safe suddenly look like stages, every window a pair of eyes, every corner hiding something that probably wants something from you. Here, you’re the guy who lost his dad and somehow lost his girl in a way that still kinda hurts to think about. Everyone acts like they’re just saying “sorry for your loss,” but you can tell some of them are measuring you, like they’re checking if you’re finally ready to be used. The game leans into that feeling hard. A lot of scenes are tight POV shots, you see what he sees and it makes the voyeur vibe way stronger than I expected. Peeking through doors that are slightly open, catching your mother figure bending over in a thin robe she really shouldn’t be wearing around you, your sister walking from the shower with a towel that keeps “almost” slipping. It plays dirty with that “accidental” exposure, and half the time you know it’s not really accidental at all. The models are full-on 3D with big curves that look like the dev spent way more time on tits and ass than on faces, but honestly for this kind of story it fits. When those scenes shift from sneaky looks to actual sex, the camera stays close to skin, to wetness, to the way she rides you, nothing artistic or fancy, just raw animated fucking, tits bouncing in your face, ass shaking in your hands, heavy breathing in your ears while the rest of the world, and all the creepy supernatural weirdness, kind of melts out of focus.

What makes it feel odd in a good way is how the paranormal side keeps poking through the horny stuff. You’re trying to get your dick wet and suddenly time stutters, lights flicker, you hear a whisper that sounds like Mia but she’s not there. Sometimes when you cum, there is this short flash of something like power, like your body is a battery and sex is the switch, and afterward some character acts different around you, like they remember a thing you never told them. There is at least one moment where you’re spying through a crack, watching a very close relative play with herself in bed, and the scene keeps slipping between “real” and something more like a vision, her eyes glowing for a second, the room changing color, her moans turning into words you can’t quite understand. The game never fully explains it, just trusts you to ride along while you decide if you want to be the good son who resists or the guy who gives in and fucks his way right through the family tree. That choice system can feel a bit messy sometimes, a couple of times I picked an option and the reaction didn’t quite match what I thought he’d say, like the writer forgot what tone that scene had. Still, I kept clicking through on my phone like some horny raccoon going through the trash, especially during those long nights when you wander the house, peeking into rooms, catching your mom’s nipples outlined through her thin tank top in the kitchen, or your sister bent over her desk in shorts two sizes too small. The more the plot about ancient conspiracies and your “destiny” ramps up, the more the sex scenes stop feeling like random porn and start feeling like weapons, or maybe traps, or maybe both, powered by whatever freaky super ability is waking up inside you every time you slide into someone warm and familiar and absolutely off-limits.

RICO: Sin City feels like somebody took a GTA-style sandbox, smashed it together with a superhero cartoon marathon, then poured a whole lot of porn over the top and shook the bottle until the cap blew off. You’re this walking disaster of a criminal informant, technically “helping” the authorities, but mostly getting dragged through a city that’s completely fucked. Heroes are corrupt, villains are bored, random NPCs act like they escaped from ten different franchises at once, and everybody’s horny or violent or both. The game doesn’t really care about moral lines; it cares if you’re having fun bullying the city, jerking off in places you probably shouldn’t, and abusing whatever powers and contacts you collect. One moment I’m extorting some costumed idiot for intel, the next I’m getting head from a busty “heroine” on a rooftop while gunshots echo in the street and I’m thinking, yeah, this is probably not how justice works. The tone jumps from dumb gag to filthy sex to crime thriller and then back to meme-level stupidity in like three clicks, which somehow fits this world where nobody acts like an adult unless it’s about money or orgasms.

Sex scenes are where the game goes from “okay, this is funny” to “oh shit, my browser history is ruined forever.” There’s a lot of focus on big tits, big asses, and the kind of exaggerated bodies that look like they got patched in from a hentai subreddit. The girls move, jiggle, grind on your face, ride your dick and then pause mid-thrust to crack some dumb superhero reference that only makes sense if you grew up binging cartoons and reading fanfiction at school. Masturbation is everywhere too, not just as a side thing, but woven into the jokes and the story. Caught spying on a heroine changing in some crappy safehouse? Now your character is furiously jerking off in a dark alley like a degenerate, with the camera lingering way too long on his hand and the wet sounds. There are little animated touches when you blow a load over a costume or watch her stroke you off while pretending she’s doing “evidence handling.” It’s shameless and kinda proud of it. I had one encounter where I used superpowers to pin a criminal chick against a wall, watched her tits bounce under torn fabric, then the scene turned into this half-interrogation, half-fuck session that ended with her taunting me about snitching while still dripping my cum. That’s the vibe: nobody’s clean, everybody’s using everybody, and the game laughs at you for taking it too seriously. In between all the fucking and jerking, you’re doing petty crime errands, dumb superhero parodies, and crossing over with characters who feel “almost but not exactly” like people you’ve seen in other media, like the dev is daring some lawyer to notice. The pacing is like a drunk party: too loud in some corners, too slow in others, someone’s making out on the couch, someone’s stealing the TV, nobody knows who owns the house. And yeah, the UI pisses me off in this one little menu, but I’m still clicking back in like a raccoon digging in the same trash can every night, hoping for something filthier.

You’re this so-called genius cultivator student who absolutely did not ask to be dropped in the middle of a collapsing multiverse, but here you are, with way too much power, a dick that gets you in trouble, and a mentor who looks like he could punch a planet in half and then go back to meditating. The whole thing feels like someone smashed together a Wuxia power fantasy, cyberpunk neon porn, and those old-school space harems where every woman is absurdly hot and also probably able to crush you with one thigh. Which, by the way, happens at one point, and it’s animated enough that you kinda feel it in your ribs. You’re chasing your lost heritage, talking about Dao and cultivation realms, but every “breakthrough” ends up with you buried in some monster girl’s tits or pinned against a glass wall by a smug cyber-elf with glowing tattoos and a strap-on that hums like a starship engine.

The game swings really fast between serious “save the universe” stakes and “ok, now watch this tiger-eared general with a huge ass ride your virgin protagonist until he can’t breathe.” There’s this early scene where your battle group of women, all completely different flavors of dangerous, argue about tactics. It starts like classic sci-fi war room talk, then one of the twins just casually drops “We should test his endurance again, he almost fainted during the triple-oral training,” and nobody blinks. You end up on your knees in some high-tech cultivation chamber, three girls using you like a living toy while their auras clash and glow all around you, neon lines tracing over their skin, tails swishing, cybernetic implants pulsing, and they complain about your technique like it’s just drilling homework on Discord. The MC is technically this unstoppable prodigy, but half the time he’s getting blindfolded, tied up with glowing restraints that react to his spiritual energy, and used as a focus tool while the girls fight off monsters in the next room, dripping back into the scene covered in ichor and sweat and then grinding on his face like it’s part of the ritual.

Sex scenes feel less like “reward for quest” and more like a twisted part of the cultivation path. Need to unlock a new superpower? Fine, time for a group session with the twins and the stoic swordswoman where they edge you with toys that look like ancient artifacts, talk about meridians and energy flow while you’re balls deep in a fox-girl who purrs and claws the floor, then they time your orgasm to a cosmic event outside the window. There’s a cyberpunk city arc where you chase a lead on the Cursed God, and instead of subtle detective work, you end up in an underground BDSM club run by a furry empress in a latex qipao who uses your cock as “payment” for information, testing you with shock-collars and breathplay while rain hits the neon glass. One moment you’re trading philosophical bullshit on destiny, the next you’re getting deepthroated by a monster girl with bioluminescent tongue rings who swallows you to the base and then opens a portal with her free hand like it’s nothing. It’s messy, it’s horny, it’s obsessed with big tits, big asses, swallowing, creampies that actually matter for the plot, and that weird tension where your “battle group” is supposed to protect the universe but keeps ending up covered in your cum, arguing over who gets to be your main wife while a god eats galaxies in the background.

There’s this thing the game does right away that I actually respect: it doesn’t pretend you’re a hero. You’re just a messy, horny, slightly broken person thrown into a gothic hellhole where every shadow either wants to kill you or fuck you or both at the same time. The “survival horror” part actually matters, not just in the jump scare way, but in the “ok, if I follow my dick here, I might end up chained to a wall with some demon girl sucking my soul out through my spine” way. First time I got that “choose to hide or follow the moaning” prompt, I obviously followed the moaning. Of course the corridor was lit in that sick red and the sound design was wet as hell. And yeah, it was worth it, but I walked away from that scene with my health wrecked, sanity lower, and a mark on my body that keeps showing up in later scenes. That mark is like this little dev note written on your skin: “you’re horny, I know, you will suffer for it.” Sexy punishment, basically.

What I really liked is how it lets you lean into being submissive, dominant, or that chaotic horny survivor that just flips depending on who’s in front of you. One moment I’m pinning a possessed priestess to the altar, hand at her throat while she’s whispering this prayer that sounds more like begging for dick than religion, and the very next route dump I’m the one on my knees in some filthy crypt, forced to “pay” a demon guard with my mouth so he lets me pass. It’s not just “pick dom option, get dom scene” either. If you act like a ruthless bastard earlier, some characters remember that and push back. I had a run where I kept choosing the arrogant, aggressive replies and finally one of the demon twins snapped, took control mid-sex scene and basically used me like a toy until my character passes out. That reversal felt earned. Annoying and hot. Like a bad ex that knows your buttons too well.

Small thing that irritated me: the text choice boxes are too close to the bottom and on Chrome mobile I kept hitting the damn navigation UI when I just wanted to pick the option about biting the nun’s thigh. It pulled me out of the moment every time but I kept playing anyway because the pacing of sex and horror is like watching a slow car crash in latex. Half of the nudity is filthy, sweaty, scratches-on-your-back kind, but then you get this scene in a candlelit library where a demon boy with white eyes reads your mind while fingering you under a table, and you forget you were even supposed to be scared. Or bisexual tension hits out of nowhere: you walk into a ritual chamber, there’s this couple, one demon, one human, and instead of choosing who to fuck, the game lets you slide right into a threeway that still somehow keeps the occult vibe going. I kept telling myself “ok, this time I’ll actually try to survive, not just chase every hot body,” then the UI pops a new corrupted choice in red text and, of course, I click it like an idiot. And the worst part is that the game knows. It keeps asking what you crave, like some smug supernatural therapist who gets paid in your orgasms and bad decisions.

Empire of Heroes looks like somebody smashed Pornhub, a Marvel fanfic subreddit and a horny DeviantArt gallery into one long fever dream, then forgot to hire an editor. You start as this dude who is technically a “hero,” but honestly he feels more like a guy who spends half his time saving the city and the other half trying not to stare at boobs that look like they could file for citizenship on their own. The world is packed with powered people, but almost everyone you actually talk to either wants to punch you, ride you, or both in some weird order. One second you’re in a rooftop fight where your power is going off like a bugged-out Discord notification, next second you’re flirting with a girl whose costume has less fabric than my old gym socks. The mood keeps jumping from dramatic comic-book speech to “fuck me on this couch before the villain shows up,” which sounds bad, but somehow it kind of works, like watching The Boys on mute with Pornhub audio in the background.

The big charm is how dirty and stupidly playful it gets without pretending to be classy. There’s this scene where you rescue a heroine who’s supposed to be this serious, veteran type, and ten lines later she’s teasing you about how “stress relief” is part of a hero’s duty while she grinds on your lap in a torn suit. The camera is obsessed with asses, not gonna lie. Every time a woman turns around the angle zooms like it was made by a guy who grew up pausing Netflix to stare. Some choices matter too: if you act like a cocky bastard, some girls actually like it and push back, if you try to be “good guy” hero, you still end up with your face between huge tits half the time. Fights are there mostly to justify why everyone is half naked afterward, covered in dust and barely holding their tops together. It’s less “tactical combat” and more “foreplay with punching.” At one point I paused my Spotify because the sex scene was actually hotter than the porn I had open in another tab, which is a weird moment of self awareness.

What kills me is how the story pretends to be super serious with mystery and conspiracies, then throws in a joke about hentai or some meme-tier line like “this is not even my final form” during a boss fight, then five minutes later you’re balls deep in a villain girl with glowing eyes and a laugh that should not be turning me on. The humor is very internet: horny, dumb, sometimes cringe, occasionally perfect. They drop little in-jokes about OnlyFans, Twitter cancel mobs, even some cheap shot about people who still use Facebook, and all of that is happening while your character is trying not to explode in a woman with thighs like a Marvel budget. Not everything hits; some scenes drag, there are times where two girls argue like a bad CW show and you just want them to shut up and start making out already. The pacing is a mess, like eating a full pizza and then suddenly someone throws a cake at your face, but when the game leans fully into “superhero soap opera where everyone is horny and slightly unhinged,” it kind of nails exactly that trashy, late-night energy that makes you think “ok, one more scene” and then you realize your right hand hurts more than your mouse.