On this island full of crazy strong amazon warriors, you arrive as this cocky outsider who honestly should die in the first ten minutes, but somehow every proud warrior girl keeps underestimating you. The whole thing is like someone mashed comic book Justice League porn with a kinky strategy game. You’re not just clicking through sex scenes, you’re actually poking at fragile egos, pushing rivalries, and watching these legendary fighters slowly slide from “I will crush you” to “I will ride you until my legs shake”. Seeing Diana go from strict, righteous warrior princess to your messy, horny toy is basically the main dish here, and yeah, it delivers. At the start she looks at you like you’re dirt, all cold eyes and heroic speeches, and by the time you’ve pushed the right choices and trained her in your “methods”, she’s choking on your cock on her own throne, trying to keep her dignity while drooling all over you. You can go gentle for a while, pretending romance, but the game is clearly happier when you go full corruption: hand around her throat, one hand under her skirt, whispering how her sisters are going to watch her get fucked like a slut.

The fun thing is how the game keeps giving you these little power tests. Like, you’re in some council scene, surrounded by half-naked amazons trying very hard to look serious, and the game throws a choice at you: respect tradition or slide your hand up Diana’s thigh in front of everyone. Pick the sneaky horny route and she flinches at first, jaw tight, but she doesn’t stop you. Next time, she spreads her legs a bit and pretends she’s just “adjusting her armor” while your fingers are inside her. It escalates fast. One moment you’re just groping her ass during a debate, the next she’s on her knees under the table, giving you a sloppy blowjob while the other warriors argue about politics. And yes, the creampie stuff hits hard too. There’s something deeply satisfying the first time you fuck her raw in the training grounds, pin her against the wall with your hands around her wrists, and watch her entire proud body shake when you cum deep inside. She tries to scold you about “honor of the Amazons” while your semen is literally dripping down her inner thighs. That’s the mood.

It’s not just one-on-one, either. Once you get some control, the harem aspect starts to bloom and the corruption gets way more spicy. You can pit amazons against each other, then reward the “winner” by making her lick your shaft clean after you’ve just blown a load in her rival’s pussy. Group scenes with Diana and other warriors are some of the best content: she starts off jealous, trying to act above it, but you can make her hold another girl’s hips open so you can slam into her, then order Diana to clean up the creampie with her tongue. There are lesbian bits sprinkled all over, too: training sessions where two warrior girls are forced to “practice close combat” until they end up grinding on each other, moaning, while you watch and decide who gets your cock that night. At one point I had Diana riding me while another amazon, totally broken in, was kissing her, sucking her nipples, and begging you to fuck them both harder. Batman even shows up in this weird crossover vibe, and instead of saving the day he ends up looking like background furniture while you’re balls-deep in the so-called symbol of justice. The whole game feels kind of wrong in a very good way: lots of BDSM flavor, rough grabbing, making a legendary female warrior beg for your cum, all wrapped in this corrupt-political-mythology porn soup that shouldn’t work, but yeah, it really fucking works.

Tiny horny wizard kid gets the worst luck and the best luck at same time. One magic screw‑up, poof, he’s shrunk to smurf size and dumped in this village where literally every blue girl has huge tits, big bubble ass and zero real privacy. It feels like walking into a parody hentai version of a Saturday morning cartoon you half remember from childhood, except now the camera actually follows his eyes when he stares at their cleavage. The game doesn’t pretend to be polite. First minutes you’re already peeking through windows, catching a Smurfette grinding a fat dildo, blue thighs shaking, moaning in that cute cartoonish way while the protagonist is outside trying not to breathe too loud. There’s that RenPy click‑through rhythm, you know, but they keep stuffing it with animated loops of boobs bouncing, sticky handjobs, goofy tongue play, so it’s never just text box → static image → next. Sometimes it even feels like you’re scrolling through a very horny WhatsApp gallery made by a perv who grew up on 80s TV.

What I like is how it pretends to be an adventure and then keeps distracting you with groping chances. You go somewhere to “help with chores” and suddenly you’re massaging a Smurfette’s back, fingers sliding lower, grabbing a handful of that big blue ass while she half protests, half pushes back against your hand. There’s a light sandbox vibe, you wander around the village doing random shit, triggering mini scenes, sometimes nothing happens and sometimes you’re getting a sloppy blowjob in a mushroom house while her tits wobble against your thighs. I had one scene where she’s riding your cock, oversized breasts bouncing all over the place, and the camera basically forgets his face exists and just locks on her nipples smearing with drool and cum. Felt like some horny Instagram reel I shouldn’t be watching at work, except with goblin‑ish magic jokes. The parody is a bit all over the place, it misremembers stuff from the original show in a funny way, like it knows the nostalgia but doesn’t really care about being correct. Sometimes that made me grin, sometimes I rolled my eyes, but then a monster girl pops out of the forest, pinning the guy to the ground and teasing his dick with a clawed foot, and suddenly I forget what I was annoyed about. It’s kinda messy, kinda clumsy, but when a blue babe pushes your cock between her tits and starts a wet titfuck while another one watches through a crack in the door, hand in her panties, tongue out, the only real problem is that you can’t climb inside the screen.

You start as this worn out taxi guy who looks like he slept in the backseat more than in a bed, and honestly, he kinda acts like it too. Long shifts, shitty tips, sick mom at home, and a brother who treats responsibility like an optional DLC. At first the game almost feels too normal, like, alright, another day, another drunk passenger who smells like cheap vodka and regret. Then this one woman gets in the cab. High heels, tight dress that looks expensive enough to pay all your bills, calm voice that somehow makes you feel both safe and like you’re about to fuck up your entire life. From that point, the story just quietly shifts from “I’m broke and tired” to “oh, I might actually die or worse, catch feelings.” It doesn’t shout at you, it just slowly pulls you into this mafia family drama, one choice at a time, one blowjob at a time.

The sex here doesn’t feel like some random bonus level, it’s tangled right in with the power shit and the manipulation. You think you’re just flirting for fun in the backseat with some big titted milf who likes to lean forward so you can see all that cleavage, but then your next ride, her husband’s cousin is asking questions, and suddenly that quick titfuck scene you just enjoyed is a massive problem. The game loves doing that. You agree to something because her lips are wrapped around your cock in the front seat and your brain is halfway melted, then later you’re realizing “oh, yeah, I kinda sold my soul for that blowjob.” One of my favorite early moments is in the taxi at night, rain on the windows, when she slowly slides over from the passenger seat, puts your hand on her thigh, and asks this very simple question that actually locks you into a whole route. You’re thinking with your dick, click yes, she unzips you, starts sucking, and the camera angle goes low so you see her throat working, spit shining your shaft while the city lights move behind her head. And in the middle of that, she’s talking about loyalty and what you’re willing to sacrifice. It’s hot and fucked up at same time.

What surprised me is how the game keeps forcing you to pick between comfort sex and “good” decisions. You can absolutely be a horny idiot and sleep around with several women, the game doesn’t stop you. There’s this big ass Italian girl with this smug smile who loves to sit on your lap in some fancy office chair, grinding slow until your cock is completely buried, pulling your face into her tits while she rides you like she owns your spine. It’s incredible, and you want to see more, but each time you give in you feel the story bending out of shape. Characters start to notice. One of them will look at you with this hurt expression during a conversation in a quiet kitchen scene, and all you can think about is the time you had her on her knees there, her lips glossy with your cum, while her phone was buzzing on the table and she ignored it. The corruption isn’t just the city or the mafia, it’s you slowly choosing lust over everything. There’s no “everybody is happy and we all share” type ending waiting for you if you fuck them all. The game is kinda mean like that, but honest. It lets you enjoy every blowjob in the backseat, every time you push a girl’s big tits together and slide your cock between them while she moans and drools on your shaft, every time you grab handfuls of ass and pound her from behind against the taxi hood, then later it just quietly makes you sit with what you did. And I really wish the main character would stop making that one weird smirk face during serious scenes, it breaks the mood, but whatever, by the time you’re deep in, following all those messy routes and trying different choices, you’re too busy wondering which woman you’re going to hurt next just because you couldn’t keep it in your pants.

Family Vacation starts very normal, like some boring trip you think your mom planned in a Facebook group, and then it just… quietly slides into the kind of shit you usually only see in those tabs you swear you never click. You’re the guy in the middle of this whole mess, trying to act like a decent adult while every woman around you keeps “accidentally” flashing skin, walking around in tiny shorts, bending over way too slow, asking for “help” with sunscreen in places that don’t need sunscreen. At first I thought, ok, generic horny vacation, I’ll click through, jerk off once, close Chrome, done. Didn’t happen. The game keeps pushing small choices, like “help her with the bags” or “stay in the pool and stare,” and suddenly you’re in a room at night, door cracked open, watching someone from your own family masturbate on the bed, biting her lip and trying not to moan too loud. That voyeur moment messed me up in a good way. I was planning to skip through story, then I ended up sitting there whispering “don’t get caught, don’t get caught” at my monitor like an idiot.

What I really liked is how the sex doesn’t start as this instant porn logic. It builds in these awkward, almost real moments. You’re brushing teeth next to her, she leans over, tits pressed to your arm, pretends she didn’t notice. In the car, cramped, someone falls asleep with her head on your lap, and your dick slowly gets hard under her cheek and the game lets you decide if you enjoy it or try to think of baseball. Then later it yanks the brakes off completely. There’s a scene at the rental house where a “game night” turns into a drunk, half-truth confession circle, everybody oversharing. One of them jokes about sharing partners, and there’s this split second where nobody laughs, they just look at each other. That’s the exact moment I knew it would go full group action. And it actually does. Clothes come off in this messy order, someone is on her knees sucking you while you’re fucking another from behind, another pair going at it on the couch. It’s not neat at all, limbs all over, camera angles switching so you see one girl getting her throat used while another gets filled raw and moans that she wants it inside. The creampie scenes are filthy in that “oh fuck, this is so wrong” way, especially when it’s someone you really shouldn’t be filling up, and the game leans into that taboo on purpose.

There’s a mix of stuff for anyone who’s into power games and softer teasing. One route I took, I played the protagonist more controlling, saying rougher things, grabbing hair, making her open her mouth and hold eye contact while you finish on her tongue, and she pretends to resist but her legs keep opening wider. Another time I went gentler and the same girl ends up guiding your hand herself, placing it on her ass and basically begging you to spank her harder. That spanking sound is weirdly satisfying, like the dev spent too much time perfecting that one thing and then forgot to fix a typo in the menu. Speaking of tiny annoyances, there’s this one scene where a character keeps calling you by a nickname that sounds like something from a kid’s cartoon and it completely kills the mood, but I still didn’t skip it because the way she drops to her knees right after is just too hot. There’s also a moment in the bathroom where you catch two of the girls together in the shower, kissing slow, hands everywhere, one sliding down between the other’s legs while the water hits their backs. I thought it would just be a short tease, but they keep going, licking, sucking, grinding on each other’s thighs, and you can either sneak-watch or walk in and turn it into a threesome that gets really, really dirty once someone suggests “we should share him.” That whole vacation vibe of “no neighbors, nobody watching, rules don’t matter” somehow makes every blowjob, every time you push in bare, feel more risky, even when you know the game will let you cum inside as much as you want. And yeah, the whole family angle is not just background, it’s in your face, in the way they talk to you while you’re inside them, using those wrong names, thanking you like it’s the most natural thing in the world to fuck each other between beach trips.

Vanessa thinks she’s just taking a comfy office job, talking about other people’s messy love lives while she sits in a nice chair with a clipboard. Then the elevator doors open, she sees her ex again, and her brain basically bluescreens. This is the woman who used to make her legs shake against a cheap mattress, now in a fancy suit, acting all professional, like she didn’t once make Vanessa come so hard she bit her own shoulder. And yeah, technically Vanessa is here as a “relationship psychologist,” but it takes about five minutes to realize the whole company is horny, lonely and way too hot to keep things strictly ethical. Every session turns into a test: listen like a good therapist, or slide a little closer, touch a little longer, let those “what if” thoughts drip into something real.

The vibe is slow burn at first, like a good office gossip chat that accidentally turns filthy. You sit across from a coworker with a ring on their finger and a dead bedroom at home, they talk about frustration, and your brain goes: “What if we just… fix that. Right here.” Some are soft and shy, fingers twisting their wedding band while their eyes keep dropping to Vanessa’s chest. Some are cocky, literally, with that futa coworker who can’t sit still in her chair because she’s hard as hell under the desk, trying to keep it “medical.” There’s this one scene that really stuck in my head: late evening, blinds half closed, the city lights outside, and Vanessa is kneeling between a client’s legs, pretending it’s still a session. She keeps asking calm questions with her mouth full, like “Does this help with your anxiety?” while spit and precum run down her chin, and the client can’t even answer, just grabbing her hair. It’s filthy and a little funny at the same time, like porn with a straight face that keeps slipping. Sometimes she starts the session with a notebook and ends it with her tits wrapped around someone’s shaft, trying to keep eye contact like it’s part of the therapy method. Other times it’s just her alone, past midnight, rubbing herself on her office chair after someone leaves, panties pushed aside, hand clamped over her mouth so no one in the hallway hears her moan her ex’s name instead of the client’s.

Half of the fun is how the “sandbox” stuff makes it feel like wandering in horny LinkedIn. You check your messages like you’re opening Slack, only instead of boring memos it’s a married woman hinting about “extra help” or a jealous coworker asking for a private talk in the break room. You poke around the building, pop into someone’s office, and next thing you’re sitting on their lap, their hands under your blouse while they confess their “emotional needs.” The teasing is constant: ass brushing against someone’s crotch in the copy room, a “friendly” hug turning into a hand sliding down the back of your skirt, a coworker dropping a file and making very sure you see her big tits when she bends to pick it up. Sometimes it’s gentle stuff like soft lesbian kissing in the storage room, thighs pressed together, fingers sneaking under a blouse. Sometimes it’s rougher: a client pinning Vanessa against her own door when she tries to keep it professional, grinding against her big ass until she finally gives up and opens her legs. The best part is how often the game lets you just sit in the tension, watching someone stare at her mouth while pretending to talk about their “communication issues” at home. One moment she’s giving calm advice, the next she’s stroking them off under the desk while they try to keep their voice level, swallowing moans between fake business words. And somewhere in the background, her ex is always there, watching, testing, flirting through half-truths, like the final boss of bad decisions. It feels messy, horny in a very “this is a terrible idea, keep going” way, and yeah, it made me hate my own boring non-horny office job a little bit more.

You’re this so-called genius cultivator student who absolutely did not ask to be dropped in the middle of a collapsing multiverse, but here you are, with way too much power, a dick that gets you in trouble, and a mentor who looks like he could punch a planet in half and then go back to meditating. The whole thing feels like someone smashed together a Wuxia power fantasy, cyberpunk neon porn, and those old-school space harems where every woman is absurdly hot and also probably able to crush you with one thigh. Which, by the way, happens at one point, and it’s animated enough that you kinda feel it in your ribs. You’re chasing your lost heritage, talking about Dao and cultivation realms, but every “breakthrough” ends up with you buried in some monster girl’s tits or pinned against a glass wall by a smug cyber-elf with glowing tattoos and a strap-on that hums like a starship engine.

The game swings really fast between serious “save the universe” stakes and “ok, now watch this tiger-eared general with a huge ass ride your virgin protagonist until he can’t breathe.” There’s this early scene where your battle group of women, all completely different flavors of dangerous, argue about tactics. It starts like classic sci-fi war room talk, then one of the twins just casually drops “We should test his endurance again, he almost fainted during the triple-oral training,” and nobody blinks. You end up on your knees in some high-tech cultivation chamber, three girls using you like a living toy while their auras clash and glow all around you, neon lines tracing over their skin, tails swishing, cybernetic implants pulsing, and they complain about your technique like it’s just drilling homework on Discord. The MC is technically this unstoppable prodigy, but half the time he’s getting blindfolded, tied up with glowing restraints that react to his spiritual energy, and used as a focus tool while the girls fight off monsters in the next room, dripping back into the scene covered in ichor and sweat and then grinding on his face like it’s part of the ritual.

Sex scenes feel less like “reward for quest” and more like a twisted part of the cultivation path. Need to unlock a new superpower? Fine, time for a group session with the twins and the stoic swordswoman where they edge you with toys that look like ancient artifacts, talk about meridians and energy flow while you’re balls deep in a fox-girl who purrs and claws the floor, then they time your orgasm to a cosmic event outside the window. There’s a cyberpunk city arc where you chase a lead on the Cursed God, and instead of subtle detective work, you end up in an underground BDSM club run by a furry empress in a latex qipao who uses your cock as “payment” for information, testing you with shock-collars and breathplay while rain hits the neon glass. One moment you’re trading philosophical bullshit on destiny, the next you’re getting deepthroated by a monster girl with bioluminescent tongue rings who swallows you to the base and then opens a portal with her free hand like it’s nothing. It’s messy, it’s horny, it’s obsessed with big tits, big asses, swallowing, creampies that actually matter for the plot, and that weird tension where your “battle group” is supposed to protect the universe but keeps ending up covered in your cum, arguing over who gets to be your main wife while a god eats galaxies in the background.

This thing throws you in as the new guy at some boring-ass office, but baby, nothing is boring for more than five clicks. One minute you are a shy virgin trying to remember your login password, next minute the HR milf is "helping" you relax under the desk with her mouth while you pretend to read an Excel report. The whole vibe is that cheap corporate hell: fake smiles, horrible lighting, coffee that tastes like broken dreams… and then somebody slips you this weird drug that turns meetings into porn scenes and every harmless little crush into straight-up corruption. It feels like those trashy workplace dramas you watch on your phone during lunch break, except now you control every horny mistake the main guy makes. And he makes a lot. He is supposed to be this normal dude, but I corrupted him into a blackmailing little demon in like ten minutes and I do not regret a thing. Well, maybe a little. Actually no.

The fun starts when you realize everybody in that office has some secret and your cock is basically the master key. Boss lady with the icy stare? Yeah, she does a full ahegao face the moment you pin her against the copier after you "accidentally" find her dirty messages. That older coworker who looks like she should be shouting about deadlines? Milf territory. She pretends to be all strict and professional, then five choices later she is on your lap in the break room, skirt around her waist, riding you slow while your Slack notifications pop up in the background. There is this one scene where you are stuck in a late meeting and you can either stay loyal and keep things cute, or spike your own confidence with that fucked-up drug and turn the whole scene into a power move. I picked the nasty route, obviously. I blackmailed my boss with some documents, made her get on her knees in her glass office, and some poor NPC on the other side of the glass is just typing like nothing is happening. The animation sells it way more than I expected. Her lipstick getting messy, eyes rolling up, that over-the-top ahegao like she just got hit by a truck full of orgasms. Completely ridiculous. I loved it.

It kind of pretends to be a romance at times, like a dating sim where your choices "shape your future", and technically yes, you can be sweet and build relationships and go for softer stuff like cuddly oral in a quiet corner or slow vaginal sex with a coworker who actually likes you. I tried that path for a bit, took one girl on what is basically an office-date, picked all the nice options, listened to her talk about her career dreams, kissed her in the copy room like a gentleman. Cute. Then the next scene I turned around and blackmailed another woman with some incriminating files, pushed her over her own desk and pounded her until she was drooling and moaning like a hentai meme. The game lets you act like the romantic good boy or a corrupt little bastard, and I kept switching because my attention span is trash. One second I am sending flowers, the next I am threatening to leak somebody’s secret unless they get on all fours. And the office backdrop makes everything nastier somehow. That sound of keyboards while you are balls-deep in your boss, her trying to keep quiet, that risk of someone opening the door at any moment. It is messy, morally wrong, a bit silly, and absolutely feels like something you should not be playing at work, which of course means you absolutely will.

Dream Office looks kind of harmless when it loads, like some normal corporate dating sim where you just flirt around and click through the day, but the sound tells you what kind of game it really is way faster than the visuals do. First time the boss leans over your desk and you hear that tiny leather creak of her chair and the low hum of the air conditioner behind her, I went “ok ok, this is one of those.” They actually put a lot of care into the boring office noise, which makes the sex stuff feel way dirtier than it should. Printer going in the background while she’s stroking you under the table? That stupid little paper feed sound had more impact for me than the whole corruption plot at that moment.

You play the typical nervous virgin office guy, but here he actually sounds nervous. He doesn’t talk much, but those short breaths, the little gulp when the milf boss corners him in her office and locks the door, that sells the scene harder than the animations. There’s this early moment where she’s pretending to “teach” you about reports, leans in too close, and you just hear her nails tapping on the desk, slow, and the chair squeaking every time she shifts closer. No moaning yet, just all that tension noise. I replayed that scene twice only to listen, which is probably not how normal people play porn games. Whatever.

Once the drug stuff starts everything goes from kinda sexy to “ok this is fucked but hot.” There’s a bathroom scene with forced oral where the echo is brutal in a good way. Tile reverb, those wet sounds are way too detailed, like someone sat with a mic and a bowl of yogurt for half a day. The first time the girl looks up at you with full ahegao face, they mix her panting with a tiny bit of hallway noise outside the door, so you always feel like someone might walk in. I hate that I noticed the air vent sound over her sucking noises, but it gave me this weird “I’m absolutely not supposed to be here” vibe that fit the corruption thing too well.

Not everything lands. Some climax sounds are copy-paste, you can hear exactly the same “ugh-ah” combo used on two completely different characters, which kind of kills the fantasy when you notice. One of the office girls has this moan that loops a bit too perfectly, like a 2-second TikTok audio someone just dropped in, and after you catch that, you can’t unhear it. There’s also a blowjob scene in the break room where the coffee machine is doing that constant loop hiss in the back and it drove me insane because it never shuts up, even while she’s gagging on your cock. Who leaves the machine steaming that long? It sounds like it’s about to explode and nobody cares, they just keep going, her choking, the rhythmic slurp, water boiling, like some cursed ASMR. I kept waiting for someone to complain about it and nobody did.

When the romance angle sneaks in, with you choosing softer options instead of full blackmail shit, the audio actually calms down a bit. Less noise, more breathing, more sheets rustling when you finally get proper vaginal sex instead of rushed oral under a desk. The first time you take that “good guy” route with one of the older women, you get this slower scene in a dim office after hours, and you can barely hear the city outside and the PC fans still running. Her voice there is so different, like the VA finally got to play a normal woman and not a drugged-up toy. She still whimpers and pushes back on you, but there’s this one low “don’t pull out” line she whispers where they kept the room tone just a bit louder, and it feels intimate instead of just porn loud. It’s kind of funny because the game is all corruption and blackmail and office power games, and the most romantic bit for me was just two people fucking quietly while Excel is still open on the screen.

Three guys, one messy timeline, way too many chances to fuck it all up and still end up balls-deep in someone you probably shouldn’t be touching. That’s basically the whole vibe here. It looks like your usual “oh we’re in school, we’re adults, we’re responsible” kind of story, but the game never really pretends these dudes think clearly when there’s a soft pair of tits in front of them. You jump between the vice-president boy who tries to act like a prince, the lazy college clown who coasts on charm, and the older bar owner who pretends he’s above it all while obviously staring at every big ass that walks by. It feels like watching three porn plots that keep bumping into each other, with all the slow teasing and “this is a bad idea but I’m horny” energy that actually makes you lean toward the screen.

What gets fun is how the game loves to make you build things up, then finally let everything snap. Like you’re stuck in a quiet classroom with that girl who everyone thinks is all innocent, and you’ve been nice, you’ve been a gentleman, you’ve helped her with her notes. Then there’s this one click where you decide “fuck it” and suddenly his hand is on her thigh under the desk, she’s pretending to still read, her face going red, her eyes not even on the page anymore. Pants get tighter, she whispers your name, and you get that little animated movement where her lips wrap around his cock for the first time and you think “yeah, that’s exactly how he should lose that perfect reputation.” Or the neighbor milf who keeps “accidentally” brushing her tits against you in the hallway until you end up in her living room. First she “just wants a massage” and then her bra is off, her nipples are hard and shiny, and you watch her bounce slow and heavy on your dick while the game lets you decide whether you pull out like a saint or fill her up and hope she’s not ovulating. Spoiler, we always go for creampie, we just pretend to feel bad about it.

There’s a lot of little stuff that feels kinda personal. Like that moment in the club room where the sporty girl acts all cocky and pushes you against the wall, but the second you grab her ass with both hands she melts, starts grinding on your thigh, then pulls her shorts aside for you instead of taking them off properly. Or the bar scenes with the older women, where they flirt too hard, pretend to be in control, then end up on their knees behind the counter, hair messy, throat working around your shaft while you try not to click too fast on the next dialogue because the animation is actually hotter than you expected. It’s not just “boobs in your face, fuck now,” there’s that slow burning, the build up, the heavy make-out on the couch, fingering through panties, her moaning against your neck, then suddenly she’s on all fours on the bed with that round ass up and you’re choosing between sliding in slow or just ramming her until the headboard hits. The multiple endings thing makes it worse, because you keep thinking “this time I’ll be romantic” and somehow we still end up groping someone in a dark corridor and leaving them dripping on the floor after a rough quickie. Honestly, the game pretends to be all sweet and romantic, but after the third time we’re buried deep inside a classmate who definitely should not be moaning that loud with her legs on our shoulders, it’s kinda obvious everyone here just wants an excuse to be fucked stupid. And yeah, we’re not complaining. Much. I still hate that one tiny UI button on the bottom right though.

Calendar-wise, this one is absolutely a messy fantasy for that awkward “post-Christmas, pre-New-Year, I hate my family and want orc dick” week. You boot it up thinking, alright, some generic elf revenge story, I’ll tab out to Twitter every five minutes. Then the game throws this skinny, pissed-off sorcerer elf prince at you, Xareth, with this permanent “I’m better than everyone” face, and literally ten minutes later he’s getting his ass grabbed by a mountain of green muscle in a fur loincloth, and suddenly you’re not checking your phone anymore. It starts like political drama, father dethroned, kingdom stolen by some scammer king, blabla, royal duty, magic training, all that, and then out of nowhere you’re crouched behind a rock, watching orcs train shirtless, sweaty, slamming into each other like a gay rugby team that lost their clothes. And the game is just like, yeah, you can stare. Or walk up. Or grope. No explanation, no moral questions, just “do you want the big orc, the bigger orc, or the scarred orc that definitely knows five ways to rearrange your spine during anal”.

What I love and hate is how it pretends to be serious story one second, then goes full horny chaos the next. There’s this scene where you sneak into the orc camp as a “diplomat” and you’re trying to talk politics, like, “help me take back my throne,” and the chieftain is only half listening because he’s staring at Xareth’s ass. You get a dialogue choice: keep talking strategy, or let him “inspect the merchandise.” I picked strategy, because I’m boring, and he still grabbed Xareth, pushed him over some crude wooden table, and started fingering him from behind while discussing battle routes. It’s stupid and hot at the same time. The camera lingers way too long on how Xareth is trying to keep a straight face while getting stretched open, his hand shaking over the war map. And the worst part, I laughed, because the music is still trying to sound epic while you’re basically doing backroom porn with flags and torches. The oral scenes are rough too, like, not “cute blowjob,” more “orc uses your throat like it’s a warm sleeve,” especially in that group sex bath event where Xareth ends up kneeling between two orcs, one in his mouth, one ramming him from behind, and another one just… watching? For no reason? And I swear the watcher was the hottest. Or not. I keep changing my mind about that guy. Anyway, there’s also this sudden interracial monster encounter in a forest cave, where some corrupted beast-thing corners Xareth, and you’re like “ah cool, boss fight,” then the combat fades out and it shoves him against the rocks, claws tracing his muscles, and the game goes, “Do you resist, or see what happens?” and at that point I just accepted that this world runs on cum instead of logic. Twitter crashed on my phone during that scene and I forgot to open it again.

It leans hard into the whole “muscle orc, slender elf” contrast, which normally I’m kinda tired of, but here they play with it enough to keep it alive. There’s an early campfire scene where Xareth is pretending he’s in control, trying to negotiate which tribe will support him, and this broad-shouldered orc with big tusks just sits behind him, wraps one arm around that tiny waist and starts palming his cock through his robes, casual as hell, like it’s normal diplomacy. Xareth still talks about alliances while his voice gets shakier, and the text actually reacts to how long you let it go before you pick a choice. I got distracted scrolling Discord during that, came back, and the game was describing how wet his ass already was just from grinding on the orc’s thigh. I complained to myself about the font in the dialogue box not matching the vibe, and then immediately forgot about it because suddenly there’s multiple penetration in a war tent, with two orcs sandwiching him, one in his ass, one pushing into his mouth, and a third guy holding his hair and making him look each of them in the eye while they fuck him. That scene actually made me pause to drink water. Not because of the intensity, but because I kept trying to see if Xareth was still pretending to be prince or just fully orc cumdump already. The game never really decides, and honestly I like that. Or I don’t. Depends on which route I clicked last. There’s a late-game bit where you finally march against the fake king, and on the way there, instead of big speeches, you’re in the back of a wagon, sprawled over an orc’s lap, getting lazy morning anal while another guy feeds you fruit and his fingers “accidentally” slip into your mouth. I wanted more political intrigue there, but then the camera showed this ridiculous close-up of Xareth’s big ass bouncing with every thrust and yeah, alright, fine, happy holidays to me.